QUIET…

And with good reason. “The Holidays” are all-consuming. Wait, let me re-phrase, it’s not quiet right now. It’s 3 am in The Vaughan household and I just can’t sleep. It’s certainly not due to the two bulldogs (Alfred and Gru) and mastiff (Tyra) scattered about the room and bed snoring away. Or my snoring husband. Or the random little arms and legs that are laying on me and move every so often. (Yes, the bad habit of kiddos sleeping in our bed occurred and well, I was going to say “don’t judge” but if you’re going to, then you will anyway.) I was totally hell-bent on my kids sleeping in their own beds, then life happens. So it is what it is right now. We pick our battles.

I was trying to fall back asleep, so I put my headphones on and started to listen to this meditative, sleep-inducing music that a nurse suggested in the hospital. I actually really like it and think it’s worthwhile. But after about 12 minutes of just laying there, I realized I wanted to listen to the natural hum of my own crazy family.

Let’s go back to “quiet.” You actually probably didn’t notice that I haven’t posted in awhile. (I say this with a grin because you most likely got the life sucked out of you as well over the past month.) I only did a minute part of the Christmas and NYE gig and I’m still tired. I don’t mean physically (or sick) tired. I feel good. As of last Thursday, my blood counts were that of a normal person. Yay! But that’s also the dirty rotten trick oncologists like to play. Get your cancer patient feeling healthy and great so you can give them another round of chemo-which of course beats your insides up and makes you feel like crap.

Okay so we made it into 2014!!! I’ve been away from lots of TV and social media but I’m sure there ISN’t a place that you can’t find tips on your New Years resolution. Yeah, we all know how to do it (but isn’t the sticking with it part the hard thing?!) We took the kids to see “Frozen” for the second time last night. “Love is putting someone else’s needs before your own.” I believe this is a quote from Queen Anna. My goal for 2014? I love my kids and husband. Guess what? I want to be there for them. So that means getting myself healthy and beating this stupid leukemia.

We take a lot for granted. I’d rather listen to my own family and all of its noises in the middle of the night than hospital pumps beeping and nurse jargon. But I have to put it all into context and the sooner I get this chemo done with, the closer I am to being home permanently and a normal mom and wife again. Bring it on 2014.