Perspective

Ember has hit a want-Mama phase. It’s sad to see her get all teary but it’s really sweet too. She can and does still play on her own in the house, but when we are out or if she is tired or feeling unwell she just doesn’t even want me to put her down. A few times in the past couple days she’s crawled after me in the house, crying big tears and wanting me to come rescue her. (Which I of course did, as soon as I finished feeding the cats/putting the laundry in/getting something for Kate.) Where before she would happily go to anyone and sit and chill now she’s looking at them like “Wait… I don’t know you.” Once she’s back in my arms she’s all smiles again.

She is fine with Denis, for the most part, except for that pesky boob thing: I have them, he doesn’t. She loves playing with daddy but if she’s really upset over something or if she’s tired then she wants milk and there is no way around that. She’s still absolutely refusing to take a bottle. I had the very good fortune to attend a friend’s birth last week and thankfully I was only gone for a few hours overnight because Ember woke up and was seriously freaking out at Denis. He ended up sitting on the recliner with her, watching TV and waiting for me to come home. There was simply going to be no sleeping until then. He tried a sippy cup again, which she does drink out of but mostly spits it all over and plays, but the bottle apparently just makes her really really angry. It is a fake boob and she does. not. like. it.

She also has a runny nose/cold thing going on the last few days while is making night time annoying. She can’t breathe too well so nursing is not very easy, which means she ends up asleep thrashing around crying until I pick her up and jiggle her out of it. I have to sleep right next to her, she seems to need my presence while she doesn’t feel good – and I can’t blame her for that.

A conversation I had with Denis the other day really made me realize just how differently he and I experience things, especially at night time. He was saying something about Ember’s sleep and how “We thought Kate was a bad sleeper, then we got Ember!” To him, listening to Ember waking up crying at night, and him being completely unable to put her to sleep no matter what he does, Ember is worse. I almost laughed out loud when he said that though, because wow is that not my experience at all. Ember sleeps 3 hour naps (and the first stretch at night) in her crib. Ember nurses and then I can just stand up and walk out of the room – without creeping, without waking her. And if Ember does happen to open her eyes in that really drowsy mostly-asleep state she just blinks at me and closes her eyes again. Yes Ember wakes Denis up more at night – because Kate would only sleep right up close to me, she didn’t need to cry to eat. Sometimes I can get Ember back to sleep simply by laying down close to her, singing, and kissing her on the head. There is a huge list of ways that Ember is so much easier! But, again, different perspectives…. Den can’t do a single damn thing for Ember, not yet. But that also doesn’t bother me too much, as I know how temporary this all is.