Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014); a review

As much as I have a really foggy memory back to last week let alone my childhood; my cartoon was indeed the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. That theme song! Those crazy adolescent amphibians! (I also quite enjoyed the Smurfs and He-Man for reference)

I admit though that its been a while since viewing and so apart from remembering easily that Michaelangelo in orange was ‘the party dude’ I forgot the other 3. FOR SHAME!

I was in between being excited for this and being very wary; the designs and captures of the Turtles obviously not in animated form looked, well. More mutant than originally? Which should have made it more authentic but I guess they didn’t look like caricatures of turtles anymore. I can say though that as soon as the characters come to life in their different traits (Michaelangelo LOVING pizza way too much for instance) those thoughts about the physicality of them dissipates.

Where the film succeeds I would say is actually the banter and true bond between the Turtles; there are some truly laugh out loud moments for kids and adults alike but it really stops with them. Megan Fox as April just doesn’t cut it; she’s seen as a ditzy reporter “Why won’t anyone believe that I saw a vigilante turtle?!” and always has perfect hair and just can’t cut a break!

From cartoon days I remember April as being hardworking, a touch of nerd and was a credible reporter. Not so much here.. Will Arnett as her cameraman and guy not so secretly in lust with her brings some lighteness to the piece but – these scenes fall flat ultimately and I can’t imagine kids being remotely interested in these moments.

The action scenes seem too far apart and the ‘adventure’ aspect is just patchy. It feels as if they wanted to try and make this for the fans that grew up with it; but bring about a new audience. I just don’t think this will be it. Get your paws on the cartoons I say. Cheesy nostalgia is going to be better than this incarnation.

I was a bit bummed to not have a throwback to the theme song; instead we had a song by Wiz Khalifa. Um. Yeah… Just didn’t hit the mark – not the right audience?

P.S I chose Donatello as ‘my’ turtle – Purple, and nerdy. :)