You might be a parent if...

You consider macaroni and cheese and chicken nuggets a food group.
The "Five second" rule has turned into "Meh, it doesn't have any hair stuck to it" rule.
Having an audience every time you use the bathroom no longer phases you.
The floor of your car could double as a Cheerio/toy skill crane machine.
You purchase wine by the box because a bottle just isn't enough anymore.
You haven't had an uninterrupted conversation with an adult in over a year.
Mopping up all the water after bath time now counts as cleaning the bathroom.
You constantly have the theme song from an annoying kids show in your head (Die, Caillou. Die.).
You now count the seconds until another human being's nap and bed time.
Being covered in another person's pee, poop or puke no longer elicits a reaction from you.
If you have anything baby-shaped in your arms, you instinctively rock it..
You now consider a decent night's sleep anything over five hours.
An appropriate outfit is now anything that hasn't recently been spit up on.
Cool car features went from having heated leather seats to having a built in DVD player in the back.
You find yourself watching kids shows even when there are no children.
You get excited when someone other than yourself poops in the potty.
You know why the word "why" is so annoying.
You understand why sometimes animals in the wild eat their young.

If you share this post, I will buy you a pony. I suck at Twitter. I am OK at Facebook. Pinterest is my bitch. I am also on Bloglovin' and Instagram.

Julie