Things that are better than apartment hunting

I'm moving somewhere in two weeks, so I've been navigating the terrifying Craigslist waters and feeling my soul get crushed into a fine powder with every ad I respond to. Naturally this led me to making a list of things that are better than apartment hunting in the San Francisco Bay Area (I imagine it's slightly less terrifying in other areas where it's possible to exist without signing away your first born child and any chance of buying groceries each month) because clearly my time is better spent making lists than continuing the search. Oh, boy. Regardless, these are things that are better than finding a apartment:
Locking your keys in the car.
Walking up 20 flights of stairs when you have to pee really bad.
The fluoride treatment at the dentist.
Trying to fix spacing issues in Blogger.
Comcast. (lol, jk)
When the Chick-Fil-A employee forgets to throw your sauce in the bag.
Adult braces.
Drinking Pepto Bismol.
Eating licorice flavored Jelly Bellies.
Hitching a ride with a mustached man in a white van.
Completing the cinnamon challenge.
Sitting in the grass while wearing white shorts.
"Less than 20% battery" before getting on the train.
Math.
Finding something in your teeth that no one told you about all day.
Taking a shot of Jaegermeister.
Smelling someone else's B.O.
Face-planting halfway through a long run.
Deleting drunk texts while drunk so you can't read them in the morning.
Pandora commercials.
Finding spiders in your shower while you're in it.
Those burps that could go either way.
Changing poopy diapers (the worst kind).
Interviews.
Messing up liquid eyeliner on the last stroke.
Realizing you sent an incriminating text to your mom, not your best friend.
Epic hangovers.
Taking selfies in front of strangers.
Blogging about things that are better than apartment hunting in the Bay.
...Guess I should get back to it.
Jubel (Original Mix) by Klingande on Grooveshark