things my doctor didn’t tell me

It seems really strange to be posting these snow pictures today, when it’s supposed to be 65 degrees, but oh well. It just makes me appreciate the Spring weather even more!

SO things my doctor didn’t tell me (HA you thought Hospital Hooplah was over? No chance my friend, it’s like a stone dropped in a lake. The stone might have sunk to the bottom already, but the water rings are still moving). “i’m going to gut you like a fish to perform this surgery and when you wake up, you will have 25 stitches across your stomach” might have been a good idea to mention before i woke up post-op and almost passed out from the sight. “you’re going to be so weak by the time you get out of here, you won’t be able to walk up the stairs” literally surprised the crap out of me. i had no idea i would be so weak.

but both of these paled in comparison to “three months after your surgery, you will start shedding hair like a bear after hibernation”

the whole shedding thing has been the worst. I know, I’m such a brat, boohoo I’m losing a couple of hairs, some people don’t have any hair at all. I know. I’m fully aware of how lucky and blessed I am. but. I’m a girl. and my hair is kind of my thing, and I’ve always been very honest about the fact that if I have a bad hair day, i might as well take a sick day because it just rocks my world.

and it hasn’t just been a couple of hairs. i’m being honest about this because hopefully some poor girl will read this and be more prepared for the Shedding Apocalypse than I was. Because standing in the shower and watching as massive clump after massive clump of hair goes swirling down the drain is not something you want to be unprepared for.

you’re probably looking at these pictures and thinking, “what the heck is she talking about” but THANK THE LORD for hair extensions my friend. so many extensions on my head. I know this is silly, and I feel so vain just writing this all down, but it’s a part of my journey. and it’s pretty much sucked. And I think that’s ok. It’s ok to admit that some things just suck. It’s ok to cry over a couple (hundred) strands of hair. have yourself a cry. and then get up, get yourself some fake hairs, and keep going. Admit that you’re scared your going to look like Gollum from LOTR soon, and then keep going. I think sometimes we think we have to be strong 24/7. we can never admit to pain or fear or sadness. and that’s just not true. The Bible says to “share each other’s burdens”. You can’t do that unless you admit you have a burden to begin with. (and then return the favor!)

But then you have to keep going. You cant dwell on your fears or your pain, or your hair shedding. You believe in the hope of tomorrow, you believe in healing and in God’s plan and you sing sing SING!!! to those little hairs so that maybe they’ll be like that plant experiment and grow big and strong, unlike the unloved, un-sung-to hairs that wilted and stopped growing.

I’m going to have Tangled hair guys.

target sweater and oxford shirt, (both on sale!) asos velvet pants, heelsdotcom boots

for anyone who ever goes through surgery, here’s what you should know:

- about three months after surgery, you will start shedding like crazy. some people say it’s from the anesthesia, some say from the shock of surgery itself, whatever. all you need to know is that you will lose a bunch of hair.

- you won’t shed in any place that you would actually be OK with losing hair, like your legs or pits. Nope. Just your head. Good news! You get to keep your eyelashes and eyebrows.

- it won’t look like your balding, like great big patches of no hair. more like your hair just super super super thins out. i’ve probably lost about 1/3 of my hair, maybe more. I woke up one morning and started losing handfuls of hair in the shower, which went on for about a month, and then one day it just stopped. I had to cut about 4 inches off the ends though, they were just so scraggly and sad looking. BUT that doesn’t really matter when you’re wearing extensions anyway!

- GOOD NEWS! IT WILL COME BACK! I am here to tell you: don’t have a panic attack, don’t shave your head and start wearing wigs. IT COMES BACK. I’ve got about an inch long halo of hairs all over my head right now. Not really noticeable at all, except right after I blow dry my hair and they stick up around my part. I kind of like seeing them, waving around and growing all happy up there. I encourage them, keep growing little friends!

things you can do to help: biotin. drink lots of water, eat lots of healthy foods (which you should be doing already). take deep breaths. stop panicking. buy some hair extensions. wait for it to grow back. i know. the worst advice ever. but that’s about all you can do.