Worst pain yet?

When the doctor removed my gall bladder, I thought, "no pain can exceed this one." When the doctor removed my appendix, I thought, "oh, the gall bladder was worse. That had four incisions; this one is only three. Good." When the doctor unpacked two feet of gauze and crowbar-sized tubes out of my nostrils after sinus surgery, I thought, "surely, this is giving birth through the nose." Nothing can top it. The past week, my body dumped me in the freshest of hells.

My face is angry. Have you ever had lips so chapped that you tried puckering your lips to stop the burning sensation that applying chapstick slapped on your kisser? Has the sun ever burned you so badly that sheets of skin started falling off of your back? Every time you took a shower, little skin monsters kept tumbling off just by patting yourself (ever so slightly) dry with a towel? Well, my face has entered this eighth circle of hell. That saying "oh, your face hurts? Well, it's killing me?" My face hurts, and I think it's killing me. It burns, it itches, it cracks, and it peels. And I have zero idea what's causing it. Please, face, let there be an end in sight.

The kind employee at Sephora stocked me with samples that will hopefully usher in some semblance of relief. I am using the First Aid Beauty lotion, and it's helped more than anything else thus far, so let's keep it positive here, folks. I can't go around like Mr. Goldmember from Austin Powers forever.

Thankfully, I have a stallion-sized sense of humor. If that breaks, it looks like I'm pretty much screwed.

Anyway, I haven't felt much like getting Mom to take pictures of me because my face hurts, and all I want to do is roll around in a vat of aloe. I don't think Blogland wants that actual visual, so I'm sparing you all. However, I don't mind snapping some grainy iPhone shots for your viewing pleasure. (Trust me. You don't really want to see what I'm working with over here. A spoon full of blurriness makes the medicine go down.)

If my face is making me uncomfortable, I might as well wear comfortable things. Like the frock I wore to friends' renovation housewarming. I jazzed it up a bit with my new necklace that I ordered online to reach the free shipping minimum; I had every intention of returning it and then I tried it on. Game over. I also intended on returning this shirt (ordered it for the same reason as the necklace), but its softness had me at its cozy hello. I returned all of the items I expected to keep and kept all of the items I expected to return. What a crazy (re)turn of events.

The Look: Shirt: Gap (exact for $22.95--I'm thinking of getting other colors.) Necklace: J.Crew Factory (exact in three colors) Skirt: Elle via Kohl's (similar for $9.95)

(In these pictures, make-up disguises the wounds quite nicely. It's not covering it so well anymore. Oh, bother.)