HER DARK SOUL
The sun rises. Birds are singing or maybe not. The noise of the city breaks through your windows. You look in the mirror, another day is to be gone from your calendar forever in about 17hours. Omelette, moisturizer, Instagram check, coffee, one more page read from the book you started a few weeks ago. You put on your casual sporty outfit. Ready to go. Meeting the people you already know, or are just about to know. Discuss topics you like, and those that you had no interest filling your head with when you woke up this morning. And you have lunch, and you drink water, and you breathe, and you walk, and do all those human things that 7 billion other people are doing on the same planet, maybe at a different time, maybe in a different situation, maybe with a different purpose. You go to bed, and you wake up in the morning. The sun rises. Birds are signing or maybe not. The same noise breaks through your windows. You look in the mirror, and you stop for a second. You’re desperately searching for an answer somewhere deep in those eyes that hide a whole universe inside you. Trying to understand your bewildering existence.
You decide not to coexistence with life’s decisions. You take your life in your hands. You give up your usual morning omelette for a fresh fruit salad while you walk. You don’t access internet for at least one hour. You don’t overdose your brain with caffeine, instead you drink a full 250ml bottle of still water. You put on an irresistible dress.
One morning you wake up and you want this day to bring you something different. No, not start a different day, because every day is different, however boring the routine we follow is. And no lost time can be returned, and no moment can last forever. When the sun rises early in the morning, and a ray of sunshine that survives the hundreds of thousands of kilometres through the cosmic abyss, the Satellites, Earth gravitation, pollution, airplanes, trees, windows, just to gently touch your face, and let you know that you have been given some more time. Doesn’t matter if it’s only one more day, or 50 more years, you are given another chance to live and feel your life. You are given another chance to live every single second in your life, and make it beautiful, and make it worth remembering about, and make it magical. Starting from those little things like a butterfly you stop to admire when you’re rushing to work, to important decisions we make in our lives.
And from the darkest corners of my heart, there comes that egoistic desire to live my life the way I want it, because I have only one to live, and refuse to waste it on anything other than I love, enjoy, shiver from happiness. And is it really so unforgivable to want that? (Read in Russian –>)
Photos: Elena Goroshka
Edit: Daniel Dykes
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