March Fabness 2015, Round 2: Prada and Versace Brackets
Keira in Holly Fulton; Karolina in Roland Mouret
Keira: I just think it’s so depressing that neither one of us is the most famous K.K. on the planet.
Karolina: Oh, God. I hadn’t even thought of that. I need to go cry in my bed for like, three weeks minimum.
Keira in Delpozo; Karolina in Ferragamo
Keira: I know. I’m an Oscar-nominated actress, and you – well, I’m not sure what you do, but I’m certain it’s more important than whatever that OTHER K.K. does all day.
Karolina: I mean, I’m a model, so I’m not really one to tell someone else that they’re vain and their “career” is bullshit… but that bitch is VAIN, and her “career” is indeed BULLSHIT.
Keira in Giambattista Valli; Karolina in Zac Posen
Keira: Maybe we’re just not thinking broadly enough. We just need more famous K.K.s to outweigh her power.
Karolina: Are you by any chance friends with In & Out star Kevin Kline?
Keira in Valentino; Karolina in Marchesa
Keira: Um, no. And I’m not sure how much he would really help our case.
Karolina: Oh, well. Worth a shot.
NAOMI WATTS vs. ZOE SALDANA
Naomi in Stella McCartney; Zoe in Altuzarra
Naomi: Ugh. I have to stop being so adorable that beautiful small animals follow me around all day.
Zoe: Is that a thing?
Naomi in Roland Mouret; Zoe in Lanvin
Naomi: You’ll understand when you stop doing comic book movies and finally get an Oscar nomination.
Zoe: Whatever. I have a picture of me and Chris Pratt touching our belly bumps together, and that’s really all I’ll ever need.
Naomi in Balenciaga; Zoe in Atelier Versace
Naomi: Well, I suppose that’s fair. Although, it’s not fair that you had your baby like ten minutes ago and already look this good.
Zoe: I know, Naomi, but life isn’t fair.
Naomi in Armani Privé; Zoe in Michael Kors
Naomi: You think I don’t know that? I’ve been beaten out for an Oscar by Jennifer Lawrence. She was still a braces-wearing Kentucky nobody when I got my first nomination.
Zoe: I’ll tell you what. We’ll team up and take her down, and I’ll steal her blockbuster roles and you can take the serious ones. Deal?
EMMA WATSON vs. KATE BOSWORTH
Emma in Givenchy; Kate in Katie Ermilio
Emma: *double air kiss* Kate, how are you? It’s lovely to see you again.
Kate: *exasperated sigh* Hi, Emma.
Emma in BLK DNM/Dior, Kate in Valentino
Emma: What’s wrong?
Kate: You. You’re wrong. And infuriating.
Emma in Hugo Boss; Kate in Hugo Boss
Emma: Me? What did I ever do?
Kate: Um, you put like maybe 10% effort into your wardrobe this year and will STILL probably kick my ass in this battle because EVERYONE JUST LOVES YOU SO GODDAMN MUCH.
Emma in Misha Nonoo; Kate in Oscar de la Renta
Emma: It’s not my FAULT, Kate. You think I asked for this? You don’t think I’d like a bit of normalcy once in awhile?
Kate: Not really, no.
Emma in Dior; Kate in Alexandre Vauthier
Emma: Once you play Hermione Granger, people are physically incapable of not being obsessed with you. It’s a curse, Kate. A CURSE.
Kate: OMG LIKE AVADA KEDAVRA?
SOLANGE KNOWLES vs. EDDIE REDMAYNE
Solange in Christopher Kane; Eddie in Burberry Prorsum
Solange: Hey, cutie.
Eddie: Don’t flirt with a freckly Brit! I may never stop blushing!
Solange in Tata Naka; Eddie in McQueen
Solange: Can I borrow your moccasins?
Eddie: Yes! Of course! But only if you’ll loan me your – um – what do you call whatever those things on your feet are?
Solange in H&M; Eddie in McQueen
Solange: Wait, you have those moccasins in gray AND navy? #jealous
Eddie: Yes, but none of my suits are as sparkly as yours.
Solange in Calvin Klein; Eddie in Gucci
Solange: Well, maybe not, but you still suit up pretty damn well.
Eddie: Oh, I know. I mean, just look at me. I’m basically flawless.
