Last night, she said.
Last night, as we were going to bed, I leaned over to give my Adam a kiss goodnight. Right after I did I made sure to tell him then that I had stuff on my lips. Good-for-them stuff. The warning should have preceded the kiss, but where’s the fun in that? It’s gender-neutral lip stuff, albeit a little on the shiny side for the dudes, but good stuff nonetheless. We were going to bed, I didn’t think he’d mind. (No, I knew he probably would mind, but I wanted a kiss. Priorities.)
It barely touched my age in degrees yesterday (I am 27) and my lips were feeling the effects. This stuff by Malin Goetz is incredible. I got it as a sample on one of our overseas flights and it’s a miracle worker. I was performing a public service, you know. My good deed of the day, sharing this manna from heaven. It’s cold! And dry! Chapped lips were inevitable, really.
After I told him, actually, in the middle of telling him, he responded in horror, “What is this?!” I reminded him of all the gender-neutral facts and how I’m practically Mother Theresa for sharing, but that didn’t calm his fears.
Me: What? It’s good for your lips!
Him: I’m a man! I don’t put stuff on my lips!
Me: But it doesn’t smell girly, it’s not colored, and it’s from the airplane swag bag.
Him: (He, clearly bothered, wipes it off.)
Me: Fine! But if your lips get chapped, I ain’t kissing you!
I only use “ain’t” when I’m really serious, of course.
And now you know.
