It’s easy to influence the past, dummy. Use your head.
He was a small, pale creature—something between a boy and a man. And very rich, too. Almost mortally wounded by his own wealth. “I’m worried that you will only love me because of my money...
A coworker was late this morning because a person jumped onto the tracks at her subway station. The guy was struck by a train. He didn’t time it right, though, and was alive when my coworker (a...
With one boyfriend I went to Todos Santos. The first night he drank too much and got hammered in a cabana. I tried to stroke his neck but he pushed me away, so I went downstairs to the beach and walk...
My skin is fragile; bruises easily. “Maybe you have scurvy,” Alice says. Maybe I do.
My favorite rhetorical move is the one where incredible animal feats are translated into human terms in order to make them more intelligibly amazing. If you’ve ever watched a BBC or PBS nature ...
In summer not even your insides are discernible from your outsides. Blow a stream of air at your wrist and it’s no warmer or cooler than the atmosphere, just different. At home in the summer I ...
On Sunday I had a dream that I was trying to climb a hill so steep I physically couldn’t do it. That was the whole dream: I couldn’t walk up a steep hill. (Nice allegory, brain.) After wa...
It’s hard to tell whether the troops are men or boys. One of them is nicknamed Ralphie, another is hypnotized by a Greek yogurt commercial with a slim, yogurt-covered woman in it, and a third can’t s...
“Food is life—life is dear!” begins Roy Wall’s Fish and Game Cookery, published in 1945 “under wartime conditions in conformity with all government regulations controlling the...
Velvet suits! Payola! Secrets of Ryan Gosling! I went deep into the styling industry for GQ. Read it HERE.
I was listening to NPR in the car with Lily. During a dispatch, she pointed to the radio and said, “Oh, I know this reporter.” Then she smiled. “He told me that whenever he’s ...
If McDonalds had tried to sell crack pie it would’ve instantly become some sort of repugnant symbol of American excess.
One night I walked down Sunset Boulevard to a Mel’s Diner. What attracted me was the idea of pancakes for dinner, on the one hand, and Mexican waiters on the other. I feel like a baby floating in amn...
I was talking to an editor the other day when he mentioned that he met Mitt Romney while reporting a piece. “He’s a weird dude,” the editor said. “Not bad, just weird.” “On-the-spectrum weird?” I ask...
Why is it so hard to draw this from memory?
It’s not that my mind is incapable of piecing together the facts, but that I can’t even distinguish what counts as a fact to begin with.
I like how the loathsome “finance culture” of 1912 involved sitting quietly with a tabby cat on your lap.
There were two women for one man: each woman blonde, bored, and not eating. They sat on either side of an alert-eyed figure in a blue paisley suit (I wish I were inventing that detail, but I wouldn’t...
Do you have a weak spot on your body? I think most people do. By “weak spot” I mean a place that is constantly injured or harmed in some way. Maybe it is your thumb, for example, and you tend to burn...
I got to work early to work on a few things. The only other person was the VP of Technology, with whom I intersected at the Keurig machine. I asked if he often got to work early, and he said that he ...
I thought it would be fun to keep a running tally of pieces that I’ve read recently and enjoyed—some new, some from ye archives. Here it is, if you’re interested!
The King of the Deal: Want something to read? Try Michael Korda’s 1993 profile of Swifty Lazar from The New Yorker. Don’t worry, it’s not behind the paywall. Too much Michael Korda is never enough!
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