It was a few weeks ago when I went back home to my parents. By 2am it was a carbon copy night of any other night when I was 17, instead of 29. The same guy was next to me in the front of the truck....
The guest: Lisa and her husband Time: Save the date was received one year prior to October wedding date. Prior RSVP: Repeated verbally on how she wouldn’t miss my wedding for anything after all...
At 9 years old Bear is getting into the full swing of slumber parties. Full on girly giggles, late nights and nail polish spills on carpet. As a major snow storm hit us over the weekend Bear paced...
I can truly tell you that I am fucked up by this entire Bear situation. I never want her to read that sentence and feel she did something wrong though. I wouldn’t trade it for anything but my l...
Over the years Dustin and I came up with our own terms of parenting. No, we aren’t the normal family but what the fuck is normal by this day? We are two blond-haired, blue-eyed people with a h...
Box by box we put our life away. Tucked neatly into bubble wrap to head to a place we were both dreading. An apartment that neither of us wanted but it was the only option. We were sure it would o...
Because she does actually go by the name Bear and all the cool kids have one.
I realize in the movies or TV shows, when a big dramatic ending is over, usually that means the end completely. They don’t show the actors going home and dealing with the aftermath. No one th...
As we sat through days of court my heart sank more and more. It no longer looked like our hard work was paying off and I could read it on Lawyers face. The judge repeatedly questioned Dustin and I ...
There are moments that happen in your life and you have no idea they are life changing moments. I have learned that is for the better. When you sit in that life changing moment and KNOW it is happe...
Have you ever sat in a court room? It is nothing like what you would imagine. There is nothing fast pace about it. It is all about the hurry up and wait but don’t dare be late. Our first co...
There were times during this that we were able to see Bear. When another family member would sneak us over to see her or during an appointment or two that we had with her and a child psychologist. ...
Once we started the ball rolling with Lawyer, Dustin and I assumed roles for the battle whether we wanted them or not. The fact that Bear was within my blood family and the fact that Dustin and I we...
Like I mentioned before, I didn’t know what to expect going into any of this. I did know I had to step up and a lot would be asked of me. After a million hours of fact-finding and serving the...
The day I turned 16 was on a perfect summer day. I climbed in my car with my license fresh in my pocket and my Mom ran back inside to grab my insurance card. “Just in case.” She stood w...
Do you ever wonder if it would be better to know if a moment was your last? Or would you rather not know? When I know those last moments, I over-analyze. I attempt to freeze the moment and gulp to...
Need to catch up on Bears story? Start here, then try this, followed by this one and then the latest. Have you ever had to try to find a lawyer? It seems one will always need a lawyer when in a pinc...
Remember how I said some things get fuzzy with the Bear story? This is another one of those times. I could go into tiny details about life with her but there is no need. We just lived our lives li...
We are taking a break from our Bear story (lets face it, so damn hard to write) to have a wedding update post!! A post in which I may UPPERCASE too much and use these!!! But I’m the bride so ...
I always knew most of the problems that Bear’s biological Mom had but I didn’t know them all. What I did know of, I don’t think I truly understood. They were big mental health wor...
You know when something big happens and you think you will remember the details? I labored over those details years later while a lawyer harped on me to remember them all. Yet now I look back and i...
“We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” -Joseph Campbell I can remember the first day I held her. It was her Aunt&...
I don’t know if it is my age or where my friends are in life but it seems I’m a bit behind. In fact I never felt like I was dead on with everyone else. When people were finishing colleg...
There was an incident yesterday that led us to having to add something extra on the list for our Target run. A pregnancy test. I won’t go into details but this is not in our plans right now as ...
I’m not very good at making New Year resolutions. In fact, I just can’t really stand them. Somehow when people say they have goals for the new year then I can believe them, but when the...
“Like snowflakes, my Christmas memories gather and dance- each beautiful, unique and too soon gone.” -Deborah Whipp Am I the only one that has a total let down feeling after Christmas? I...
Bear: I no longer like Selena Gomez and I do NOT want her calendar this year. Me: Any reason why? Bear: Yes, she is dating Justin Beaver and she is pregnant. Me: Who told you she was pregnant? I didn...
“Where do you think you’re going? Nobody’s leaving. Nobody’s walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We’re all in this together. This is a full-...
“Christmas is the keeping-place for memories of our innocence.” ~ Joan Mills Last year I full prepared myself for the end of Christmas as I knew it. What I mean is, the end of Christmas ...
Some days my Dad is as normal as can be and others it is a nightmare. When people ask how he is, we tell them of the latest antics and laugh and they will give us looks like we have indeed lost our ...
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