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Clients From Hell
clientsfromhell.tumblr.com
49
A collection of anonymously contributed client horror stories from designers. Submit a Story Invoicing for designers, by designers. Try it for free. You should follow us on Twitter
#27330 in All

I asked a client where the payment was for the design and print-ready files I had sent him three...

I asked a client where the payment was for the design and print-ready files I had sent him three weeks ago. His response? Client: We didn’t use it. Me: Our contract stipulates that I’m to...

1 day ago

"Just because we can’t afford to create these things does not mean that we do not still do not....

“Just because we can’t afford to create these things does not mean that we do not still do not want them. With that in mind, you should consider how much business you’ll lose if we have to pay.”

1 day ago

Client: We need to make this ad welcoming, but unique. I want people to see the ad and want to touc...

Client: We need to make this ad welcoming, but unique. I want people to see the ad and want to touch it. Also, this a Family Nudest Resort. Keep it clean and appropriate while making it desirable and...

2 days ago

A client sent an (exceptionally) rude Word Doc outlining the ‘psychic’ website she...

A client sent an (exceptionally) rude Word Doc outlining the ‘psychic’ website she wanted to start, with comments like “I know you’ll have trouble understanding this,” &...

2 days ago

Client: Good news! We’re doubling the wordcount for your articles from 500 to 1000 words!Me:...

Client: Good news! We’re doubling the wordcount for your articles from 500 to 1000 words! Me: Great! I could use the extra cash. Client: Well, it’s still the same number of articles. The ...

3 days ago

A Hardcopy Clients From Hell

Do you ever find the internet a strange and frightening place? Have you begun to suspect the sexy singles in your area may not be as sincere as they seem? We’ve been quietly figuring out how to disti...

3 days ago

Client: We need you to put a watermark on all of our photos for the website so that no one can stea...

Client: We need you to put a watermark on all of our photos for the website so that no one can steal them. Me: Okay. I’ll need the original photos in a digital format so I can start placing the...

4 days ago

Halfway through an in-depth presentation I was making…Client: I wish you were wearing nothing...

Halfway through an in-depth presentation I was making… Client: I wish you were wearing nothing but those shoes. I should mention I was making this presentation to a room full of people.

4 days ago

Client from another century

To be fair, this client is more of an old acquaintance that I’ve more or less adopted. He shows up every couple of years with a new idea he needs help with. The latest is a one page website for...

5 days ago

In the middle of an hours-long business meeting with a client to discuss advertising design, she...

In the middle of an hours-long business meeting with a client to discuss advertising design, she commented on my pregnancy, asked how it was going and then offered to purchase my baby in cash. She sa...

6 days ago

Client: Can you send me this logo with no background?Me: Okay.Client: You sent me a PNG. Why?Me:...

Client: Can you send me this logo with no background? Me: Okay. Client: You sent me a PNG. Why? Me: PNGs are transparent. Client: Then what is this gray and white checkered background? I said no back...

6 days ago

Client Catch 22

Client: So the reason you stopped updating the website is because I didn’t pay you your three months of outstanding maintenance invoices? Me: I could have also suspended your account, but I kep...

22 may 12

Me: According to the contract you signed, I am still owed 2% of the merchandise you sold.Client: It...

Me: According to the contract you signed, I am still owed 2% of the merchandise you sold. Client: It didn’t add up to much. Me: How much? Client: Not much. Me: I still want it. Client: We don&#...

22 may 12

The following took place outside a rural dentist’s office. The client requested an electric sign...

The following took place outside a rural dentist’s office. The client requested an electric sign that that was a full-color copy of their business card. Four weeks and thousands later… Client: ...

21 may 12

Photo

21 may 12

Client: I have inserted a photo in the powerpoint presentation that you need to resize for a...

Client: I have inserted a photo in the powerpoint presentation that you need to resize for a billboard. Me: That image is not big enough. Client: I’m not following? Me: The image needs to be in...

21 may 12

"We need someone who sounds Hispanic, but doesn’t have an accent."

“We need someone who sounds Hispanic, but doesn’t have an accent.” - Client’s description of their ideal voice actor

21 may 12

Client: Please edit the attached 241 page manuscript. Each page is a seperate document - sorry abou...

Client: Please edit the attached 241 page manuscript. Each page is a seperate document - sorry about that. Each page was also a .jpg An incredibly low-resolution .jpg

18 may 12

Me: About my pay - it’s been 4 weeks since the due date and I haven’t received any money...

Me: About my pay - it’s been 4 weeks since the due date and I haven’t received any money yet. Client: What? Why are you wasting my time with this? It isn’t an issue until it’s...

17 may 12

"You’re a designer, your brain is different. My customers are normal people. Do you need me to....

“You’re a designer, your brain is different. My customers are normal people. Do you need me to talk slowly until you understand that?” - Someone with a normal brain.

17 may 12

Client: I think my keyboard is broken.Me: What makes you think that?Client: When I login and type...

Client: I think my keyboard is broken. Me: What makes you think that? Client: When I login and type my password, whatever key I press shows up as a little black dot.

16 may 12

Me: How do you want your customers to pay for your products on your site? I suggest using...

Me: How do you want your customers to pay for your products on your site? I suggest using PayPal. Client: What’s PayPal? Can I just have them send cash or write checks and mail it to my address?

16 may 12

Me: We’ll add security to your contact form so that you won’t get spammed. No one likes...

Me: We’ll add security to your contact form so that you won’t get spammed. No one likes that. Client: Actually, I enjoy spam every now and then. Me: Spam in your inbox? Client: They can d...

15 may 12

Client: Make the logo bigger.Me: There really isn’t any space.Client: Make space.I make the...

Client: Make the logo bigger. Me: There really isn’t any space. Client: Make space. I make the image a bit smaller and the logo 3% larger. Client: Whoa whoa whoa! No need to make the logo Mario...

15 may 12

I was doing publicity for a client.Me: A reporter from Detroit News wants to interview you...

I was doing publicity for a client. Me: A reporter from Detroit News wants to interview you tomorrow. What time are you available? Client: 10am. What station will it be on? Me: It won’t be on a...

14 may 12

Client: We won’t be paying. We didn’t use your material.Me: You didn’t? I saw the...

Client: We won’t be paying. We didn’t use your material. Me: You didn’t? I saw the brochure today, it is exactly what I designed for you. Client: No, it isn’t. You sent us a P...

14 may 12

Client: Can you print this for me?Me: No, it has Elmo on it.Client: I bought it off Etsy, and she...

Client: Can you print this for me? Me: No, it has Elmo on it. Client: I bought it off Etsy, and she said I could get it printed here. Me: Elmo is trademarked. I can’t print copyrighted material...

13 may 12

Client: All our sites are down!Me: Seems fine here.Client: We pay you to maintain this stuff, not...

Client: All our sites are down! Me: Seems fine here. Client: We pay you to maintain this stuff, not cause more problems! Me: I didn’t take your sites down. How do you know it’s my fault? ...

13 may 12

"Can you take this black and white page and make a photocopy of it back to color?"

“Can you take this black and white page and make a photocopy of it back to color?”

12 may 12

Me: So your username is your employee number, without the “e” and with an extra zero on the...

Me: So your username is your employee number, without the “e” and with an extra zero on the end. Client: Is that a capital zero? Or just the little one? Me: Just the number, zero. Client: So upper ca...

12 may 12

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