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The Whiskey Monologues
whiskeymonologues.tumblr.com/page/4
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The Whiskey Monologues is a place for quotes, stories, pictures, poetry, and prose. Usually whiskey related (but not limited to). Questions? ASK A DRUNK. AIM: WHSKYMNLGS Have a good drinking story? A quality quote? A haiku about a fat chick you met at the bar? Or how about an ugly guy? Good news! Submissions are welcome:whiskeymonologues@gmail.com (Put “SUBMISSION” in the subject line of your e-mail so it doesn’t get lost. All submissions are anonymously posted, unless requested otherwise.) NOTE: The Whiskey Monologues does not re-blog content however; if you submit a piece and it’s posted you will be credited any way you like and a link back to your site will be provided, as exemplified here.

the pebbles cut diamonds into my knees through cotton stockings as I part flowers and bushes in...

the pebbles cut diamonds into my knees through cotton stockings as I part flowers and bushes in search of the bottle of winter’s woes. my memory of losing it is hazy, compromised, and wouldn’t hold...

16 aug 11 1 person likes this

(Source: Yes- But No)

(Source: Yes- But No)

30 jul 11

Vodka makes me slippery. Loose. More than disjointed— disconnected. My mind from my body and my...

Vodka makes me slippery. Loose. More than disjointed— disconnected. My mind from my body and my limbs from each other, muscles and bones and ligaments become so much primordial ooze formed into a vag...

27 jul 11

I opened my eyes and gently removed two hands from my waist. I sat up in bed as quietly as I could,...

I opened my eyes and gently removed two hands from my waist. I sat up in bed as quietly as I could, but his eyes opened almost immediately. We shared eye contact for a moment, but I broke it as I rea...

26 jul 11

A mutual friend told me he got married after I left him.“Well, good for him,” I said,...

A mutual friend told me he got married after I left him. “Well, good for him,” I said, to no one, stumbling down the sidewalk in a pea coat. “Good. For. Him.” I’m replying to the memory of the conver...

24 jun 11

PROCRASTINATION

I shouldn’t put it off any longer. Not when I’ve known for so long. That it’s not going to work. That although we look right together there is something totally missing inside. I already feel like I’...

09 jun 11

Jameson just doesn’t burn like tequila. It doesn’t give you that just got punched in...

Jameson just doesn’t burn like tequila. It doesn’t give you that just got punched in the stomach feeling vodka achieves. A welcome comfort to the cheap beer and inferior hard liquor (which is all of ...

20 may 11

AN EXTRACT FROM "THE INVISIBLE THREAD"

The last time Fionn, Matthew and I were together before the plan reached its climax, we sat drinking in my kitchen until the wee small hours. There was a bottle of eighteen-year Talisker whisky being...

13 may 11

The alcohol crept its way down our throats slowly, calmly. No, the alcohol jumped down our throats....

The alcohol crept its way down our throats slowly, calmly. No, the alcohol jumped down our throats eagerly, one drink after another. I burned my insides with straight vodka and chased it with a forty...

11 may 11

Don’t call it a comeback.

Don’t call it a comeback.

10 may 11

where are you? i miss you. also, werent you supposed to come to new york at some point? and i was g...

I miss you, too! Yes; I was supposed to come to New York but that trip got put on hold. I’ll make it out eventually, and when I do I’ll be sure to give you a heads up and make good on that whiskey. M...

10 may 11

where have the whiskey monologues gone?

We kind of checked out and took a break. A nice, little siesta to refuel the tanks, so to speak. With whiskey, of course. It looks like we’re ready to come back.

10 may 11

" “We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey. Not because it is Scottish, but......

“” “We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey. Not because it is Scottish, but because it is good.”” - — Horace Hutchinson

16 mar 11

“I’m not drunk.”“You know that by just pointing out that you are not drunk it means that you are...

“I’m not drunk.”“You know that by just pointing out that you are not drunk it means that you are definitely drunk.”She sighed.“Damn vodka.” She put the half empty bottle of crystalline obsession on t...

08 mar 11

SUMMER

The single drop of water slid down his the flat universe of his cheek like an autumnal leaf falling from an aged oak, or a ballerina in a terribly sad ballet. It clung desperately to his chin before ...

08 mar 11

FOR NOW

It’s on nights like these that it’s the hardest. The nights where even my 800 thread count sheets can’t bring comfort from your side of the bed. These nights are not unfamiliar to me. They’re like la...

04 mar 11

WHISKEY DREAMS

I’ve had men look at me like that, but never quite the way you do. I wear my tall boots and raglan shirts and sway around at some shitty dive with whiskey in one hand and a beer in the other. You fol...

02 mar 11 1 person likes this

WHISKEY SOUR, PLEASE.

We talked about troubles over cocktails and doubles. Ongoing in her case, long past in mine. Poor kid thought the bastard in question was some diamond in the rough, as if good intentions and ample co...

01 mar 11

END OF THE WEEK

He pulled into the driveway, grabbed his jacket and briefcase off the back seat and unlocked the house. Slinging his stuff on a kitchen stool, he took off his tie and loosened the top buttons of his ...

25 feb 11

Hwhiskey, and classic Danny McBride at his finest.

Hwhiskey, and classic Danny McBride at his finest.

24 feb 11

FOR SCOTT

Every evening at about eight-thirtyMy body demands drink with firm maturityMy head will swim and stay submergedMyself and me must now divergeThe gin will seem to loose the tetherThis sin will not rep...

24 feb 11

Because the night is too long,but the whiskey tastes good,and the star I wished on last nightmoved....

Because the night is too long,but the whiskey tastes good,and the star I wished on last nightmoved to someone else’s sky(that could mean the wish is coming true,but I’m giving up until the next comet...

24 feb 11

We always seem like a force to be reckoned with, but what it comes down to is a shit fist full of...

We always seem like a force to be reckoned with, but what it comes down to is a shit fist full of glass waiting to punch you in your own gut. We’d stand on the sidewalk, Subway cup full of vodka, smo...

22 feb 11

" “I decided to stop drinking with creeps. I decided to drink only with friends. I’ve..."

“” “I decided to stop drinking with creeps. I decided to drink only with friends. I’ve lost 30 pounds.” “” - — Ernest Hemingway

17 feb 11

Homecoming. Submitted by Killing Charlemagne.

Homecoming. Submitted by Killing Charlemagne.

17 feb 11

DIRTY WHITE WOMEN

dirty white womenjudge meand scold meand say,‘you’re a drunk,ya know’they say,‘you can’t keepthis up forever,ya know’but I ignore them,these dirty white women,these awful womenI judge themand I scold...

17 feb 11

I get so depressed when I read a majority of the whiskey stories. Why are all the whiskey stories s...

Go for it and get on it.

17 feb 11

SLUR

You were drinking from a glass that was made in France, but I didn’t know it at the time. I just sat on the floor by your feet, trying to forget history. Our history. But it’s near to impossible, yo...

11 feb 11

EAST

I can’t even pretend that’s why I was drinking, I was at the bar when I got the text. But it gave me more of a reason than I’ve left the house today. I was celebrating being outside by drinking, but ...

10 feb 11

REMINDER

I stood before the floor to ceiling bookshelves, running my fingers over leather-bound editions and watching the gold letters flash with the passage of ceiling fan blades. He had quite a collection, ...

08 feb 11

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