...which is bullshit...might I add.1. Diet Coke ....how can a chemically enhanced substance that doesnt include liquor cause cancer...what the fucking fuck, America. What the fucking fuck?!2. Li...
I think it’s a common misconception that writers actually like to…well…write.Perfect example…right now…I’m in hell.I hate writing. Always have and probably always will. If you haven’t already guessed...
But I think I love these drag queens more.
I’m cute, but that cuteness will only get me so far, seeing as I’m disgusting….and lazy…and weird…and kind of an asshole…and a smidge pathetic….And for a second I thought maybe that I should reflect ...
I hate the moments when I realize that why yes, in fact I am a girl.…like when I can’t open a pickle jar without one of those old lady finger pad thingies…or when I realize that I have no clue ...
It has been two years since I graduated from college, and I can’t decide how much of an emotional wreck I should be.I like to think that I’ve grown as a person in the last two years, but quite honest...
I can never find my mother the perfect Hallmark card for Mother’s Day. Believe me I tried. But none of them captured the essence of my mother. Yeah sure there was the:“I love you mom, you’re the bomb...
We all know that I’m a weird one. But my dreams seriously take it to a new level of, “um…what the fucking fuck is going on in your head?!? Stop smiling at me like that, you crazy sociopath, you!”And ...
Why do you love me so?That is all.
I feel like the show “Girls” is getting a lot of unnecessary hate. First of all let me just say that this is definitely not a show for men, unless you want to watch the lead character get a pap...
I really don’t get my life. It’s confusing, it’s weird, and quite honestly it always smells slightly like beef lo mien. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining. Well, I’m not complaining at this ...
About two years ago I graduated from college… and I never thought it would this hard to be separated from my best friend…it’s like a part of my soul is missing…or like… going to make a sandwich only ...
Have you ever noticed that the people who talk about their sex lives with excruciating details are the people you never want to picture naked? The people where genetics didn’t quite work out for them...
Sometimes I feel like we are losing a culture. I don’t know if it is just because I’m getting older…or if it’s only because I’m finally starting to feel the beer. But I stand by my statement, however...
Ladies. We suck. Like seriously we do. Our emotions and insane ability to rationalize every answer we didn’t want to hear/bad situation/how eating certain foods while standing helps you lose weight, ...
I am not a normal person. I am aware of this fact. I have been well aware of this fact since I was four and single-handedly got all siblings banned from fields trips at my brothers school while my fa...
Lana @ That Aint Kosher tagged me with the lovely questions...so why not play along? 1) If you could only listen to one band or artist for the rest of your life, who would it be? (This may sound unor...
And then I remember how great my boobs look next to both light and dark beers.That is all.
I want to talk about the blog-o-sphere for one hot sec. Can we just all truthfully admit for one fucking second what we are really doing on the Google-nets?It cracks me up when people pretend like th...
Alright Ladies (and one dude that reads my blog), guess whos got two thumbs and just wrote her first sex/relationship advice column...THIS GIRL!And my first question is from a Ms. NellieVaughn:“How d...
No seriously is it? In the past week, Ive had so many people (specifically dudes) ask me for sex and relationship advice.I have no clue why though, nothing about my face says, "I give good ...
I suck at life. And it’s starting to reflect in my blog, seeing as I only posted once last week…and it was a repost. Gross, I know. But to be perfectly honest, the things in my life that are consumin...
I think its only right I share my awesome knowledge on dating......for the dudes 1. Be a dick.…want a lady to love you? Treat her like shit…ignore her phone calls…give her disapproving glances when s...
1. Only one garlic sauce in a Papa Johns order....Um...are you fucking kidding me Papa?!?! I dont care what the fuck this economy is doing to your fucking profits but when Im eating my feelings I wan...
…I get that…and quite honestly it’s the world that’s got an issue…not me.But come on! It is way to hard to jump on that “I want to lead a healthy lifestyle” bandwagon when you can literally buy ice c...
These are all direct quotes/convos with my mother...this is where my shit comes from...did I say I look exactly like her too? Enjoy.Me: Oh dear god…I never want kids.Mom: No you’ve got to pop out at ...
I am not a happy camper. There really is no other way to describe this situation. Well… that’s not completely true. The most accurate way to describe my current situation is, I’m a fucking alcoholic ...
1. &nbs p;Put an adjective in front of my name……for example: Zany Natalie…..Spunky Natalie…fuck off.2. Talk down to me.Here’s the thing…I’m not retarded…I went to college…I got ...
Well hello, rock bottom. We’ve got to stop meeting like this.I can’t wait until I’m a fully functioning adult, but to be quite honest I don’t think that day is ever going to come. I lost my wallet Mo...
Theres no greater feeling than being hungover since 7 am only to realize several hours later youve lost your fucking wallet. One day Ill be a functional adult... yesterday was not that day.And neithe...
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