The other day I was planning on working out in the yard, but knew I had to change from my “good” workout pants to my outdoor gardening pants. So I ran upstairs to my room to ditch the good workout pa...
For the first time in a long time, I wanted to quit blogging tonight. That sounds dramatic and worthy of an eye roll, but it’s me we’re talking about. Let me back up. A couple of months ago the talen...
Considering I’m pretty much a minimalist when it comes to everything in my life—save for words, as my rambles demonstrate—it will come as no surprise that the chances of me appearing on “Hoarders” ar...
I don’t talk about it a lot, but when I was much younger I was in a relationship with an older guy for more than five years. He wasn’t a bad guy, but it was a very bad relationship for me that left m...
Breaking news: My house isn’t perfect anymore. There are cat toys all over the place, hair on my dining room chairs and a four-legged creature wandering around—and I have survived the past two weeks....
As much as I like blogging and social media, it seems like people are taking this stuff a little too serious at times. To be honest, it’s getting a little creepy. And while I don’t have personal expe...
When given a set of instructions, my OCD kicks into overdrive and I find myself reading them over and over until I have them basically memorized and then refer back every five seconds to check what I...
Friday was a good day. After work I went with my mom to buy her flowers and hanging baskets for Mother’s Day, per our tradition. I got my petunias in the ground, went for a walk and simply enjoyed th...
Dear People of the Interwebs, You never fail to amaze me. Between some of the brilliant blog posts that urge me to think in new ways, the comics that make me laugh and the sports scores that keep me ...
As much as I love animals and support rescues with all of my heart, I understand people’s confusion when they find out I don’t have a pet of my own right now. After all, I have the resources to...
She was ahead of me in the checkout line on her phone and snapping her gum and orders at the cashier, all while looking as if standing there for five minutes was the end of the world. The cashier tri...
*Please note I said “my mom’s dog” and not “my” dog. Even though we no longer live together, I still consider Chauncey to be “my” dog when he’s cute or does something cool like show off how he knows ...
I’ve always been a little confused by women. They’ve never screwed me over or anything, but I don’t really understand them and always preferred to hang with the guys. And seeing as I generally try an...
I’ve resigned myself to the fact that birds see my Blazer as an expensive outhouse, but they’ve recently reached a new level of crappiness—projectile pooping. It’s hard to make out in this picture, b...
I have another post I was going to put up, but then I started verbally vomiting on screen and had the whole internal debate about letting you in on my crazy or not. But in the end I forgot what I was...
I’m told when I was little, one of the first phrases I uttered was “Goddamn dog.” This is due largely in part to the fact that my grandma used to throw it around on the regular when their geriatric p...
If the saying, “How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you were?” is true, that would mean I am approximately 103 years old and counting. Not only do I physically feel old and barely recogni...
If I had to classify my relationship with my hair, I would say “it’s complicated.” I’ve gone from disinterested (childhood) to horribly dysfunctional (middle school) to high-maintenance (college) bac...
This is one of those posts that I started to write a few times and then just got annoyed and stopped, as between Ashley Judd and a pregnant Jessica Simpson being in the news for their weight, the top...
Have you ever felt this way? I suspect that even the most secure, independent individual has had at least a few moments in which they stare at the computer and wonder, “Weren’t those last couple stat...
If you’re reading this, you’re on a computer or at least have online access, which means there is a temporarily symbiotic relationship between you and said technological device. This is not always th...
“I was tied, but now unbound. My head is off the ground.” I don’t have a lot of people that I’m close to, much more by choice than by chance. This wasn’t always the case, but after getting burned and...
While Thursday is generally just the day in between people annoying me with “It’s Hump Day!” and “TGIF!” it’s actually a really important day for me this week. It’s Opening Day. And yes, we have a De...
This is a post I was hoping I wasn’t going to have to publish. Why? Because it means I didn’t win the Mega Millions drawing on Friday. This is a bummer because I already had the post written for when...
I’ve conducted research in a few different states and have come to the conclusion that riding in a taxi should be considered an extreme sport. Most cab drivers not only drive defensively, but get def...
I love to people watch and people listen. And the thing about traveling alone is with one else around to talk to, you get really good at seeing and hearing all kinds of things you might otherwise mis...
Thursday night Uncle June is grabbing his bags and heading out for another work trip to Texas, but instead of Houston, it’s “June Does Dallas.” I’m going, too. You know I hate travel, but this time I...
There are a lot of people who like beer. A sign from a bar near my house. Apparently they didn’t have a liquor license for a bit and were really excited to tell people they got it back. In fact...
Today’s post is brought to you by whoever decided that the “Milford” street sign in my neighborhood had suddenly graduated into something else a little sexier. Let’s pretend MILF stands for: Masking ...
The other morning I woke up to birds chirping and sunlight streaming through my blinds. Instead of contentment, I immediately felt that both were seemingly mocking me. I wanted it to be raining, to b...
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