My friend’s mom misses her a lot since she’s gone to...

My friend’s mom misses her a lot since she’s gone to college, so she carries around a laminated picture of her and takes pictures with it wherever she goes…

yourfavoriteknigh tmare: amoying: are you ever just snuggle horny? like u dont want to do anything...

yourfavoriteknightmare: amoying: are you ever just snuggle horny? like u dont want to do anything sexual but you just want to kiss and cuddle with someone that you genuinely like and watch movies...

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Babysitting (noun)

Getting paid to eat food and watch TV while someone else’s kid takes a nap.

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Congratulations to gogurtpopo for being my 10,000th follower!! Please private message me...

Congratulations to gogurtpopo for being my 10,000th follower!! Please private message me to receive your prize

I get it

A phrase put to use when you have no idea what someone is talking about but you just want them to shut up.

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on instagram: is your name idefinition?

I have no Instagram and I dont plan on having one soon. Anyone posting these pictures on Instagram is taking them off here.

School Reunion (noun)

A meeting where it takes you only 20 seconds to realize why you haven’t seen those people for 20 years.

Break Up

She told you it was mutual.

Hand Sanitizer. Helps find cuts that you never knew were there.

Hand Sanitizer. Helps find cuts that you never knew were there.

Thursday

The Day you could have sworn was Friday.

I tried to make it the way you want it. I hope that’s okay :)

I tried to make it the way you want it. I hope that’s okay :)

Keyring

Device to be able to lose all your keys at once.

PMS (adjective) A boy’s first thought when talking to a rude girl

PMS (adjective) A boy’s first thought when talking to a rude girl

Retard

A word that is used to describe anyone but the mentally disabled

Period (noun)

The excuse girls make to eat as much as they want and do as little as they wish.

boyfriend (noun): A person who 90% of the time annoys you, and 10% of the time makes you forget the...

boyfriend (noun): A person who 90% of the time annoys you, and 10% of the time makes you forget the 90%

Food (noun)

The only reason you leave your bedroom.

Fanfiction (noun)

textual porn for nerds

EXPERIENCE

(noun) Ability to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

I know.

I actually didn’t know it, but I would seem stupid if I didn’t admit it.

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