I’ve been playing around with the idea of creating some Invading Holland t-shirts and other stuff (mugs, mouse mats, etc) for a while now and I wanted to show you (my brilliant readers) a few early e...
This is a completely improvised blog post, written live during the euro vision song contest semi final (Now Updated with links): “Wow. I really believe these presenters are improvising everything the...
Spend any amount of time in Holland and you are bound to pick up a few habits from the locals. It’s good to become integrated but there are some warning signs that you might becoming ‘too’ Dutch. You...
After a few more takes of crossing the road and dodging traffic it was time for the next setup; demonstrating the difficulties of learning Dutch when speaking to Dutch people. After giving me my dire...
It is an normal Amsterdam evening. The city is alive with people rushing around from one place to another. I am standing at a zebra crossing surrounded by a small group of unsuspecting pedestrians, a...
As I quietly sneak into the bedroom I carefully close the door behind me, slowly, gently, desperately trying not to make a sound. It is late, my wife is already asleep and I do not wish to disturb he...
Another one of my stories was recently featured on the radio back in old blighty as part of the fantastic Stuart Britton Show (no relation). You can listen to the reading by Alan Lambourn right here:
“Cabin crew to landing positions please. Cabin crew to landing positions.” I sit up suddenly, snapped out of my day dreaming by the unexpected announcement. What? Landing? How can we be landing now? ...
When I was nominated for a Bloggie I was over the moon. I was thrilled and honoured to be finalist amongst so many brilliant and amazing blogs. I felt like the excited and proud little kid who had be...
As I stare out into the cold night air of Rotterdam from the station platform where I await the arrival of my train I realize that I am a man who has been lied to. I am a man who has been wrongedR...
Regular readers who picked up a copy of Het Parool this morning might have been more then a little surprised to discover this article as they slowly read through its pages with their morning coffee: ...
*All he’s been doing for the last half hour is nodding and smiling.
“That’s the fourth bathroom visit this morning. What are they doing? There is only two of them.” I say to my wife sounding perplexed. We are staying in a small two bedroom B&B in Maa...
“I am a man!” Nearby co-workers turned their heads as I strolled into the office with great pride and triumph booming from my voice. They we are all obviously deeply curious and jealous a...
I’d been on the treadmill for nearly 20 minutes and was in need of a shower. Re-joining a gym had made me very happy. Not only was I already feeling the benefits of daily exercise but it also had the...
I was very excited about having my first visitor in Holland. Since I had only been in the country for a short while myself I had not had much of a chance to do a lot of the more touristy things yet. ...
It’s time once again for the annual Bloggie awards. The nomination round for the 2012 edition has just begun and will be open until the 16th of January. As always the Bloggies aim is to highlig...
Happy New Year from time zone GMT+1 Blog Highlights of 2011: - The Lie that Got Out Of Control - Do I Look Like A Pimp? - The Lost Bike - Unknown Delay - Stuart Smash - How To Identify A Dutch Circle...
Wife:2 – Husband:0 Invading Holland will be taking a short break during the busy Christmas holiday and will return in the New Year. Have an amazing Christmas and brilliant New Year. —R...
Pakjesavond. 11:47pm. Friesland. As I was handed the mysterious and brightly wrapped Sinterklaas gift I knew something was up. The giggling and sniggers my family-in-law were unsuccessfully trying to...
It’s been a week since I announced myself as the new leader of Holland and so far there have been no ‘official’ complaints. I take this as a sign that the Dutch government is happy to accept the chan...
People of Holland! Upon this day I, Stuart, would like to officially announce my successful invasion of Holland and the installation of myself as your new leader and ruler. Do not be afraid. Although...
Over the years I’ve written a lot about the Dutch and their funny little habits and traditions but I’ve never really written about my equally weird fellow Englishman. This seems somehow unfair since ...
The arrival of Sinterklaas can be a very confusing time for expats in Holland. It’s a tradition that raises a lot of questions for those who are unfamiliar with it. Who is Sinterklaas and why does he...
I am a speculoos addict. I have been hopelessly hooked on its sweet delicious taste ever since I tried my first sample. Since that day I have tried all different kinds of speculoos products; sandwich...
Happy Halloween from Invading Holland
As an English expat it is impossible to win any argument with the Dutch about which country drives on the correct side of the road. It simply can’t be done. It’s not because as a country that drives ...
Invading Holland will be back soon but for now here is a story from January 2008 that proves why I should not be allowed to talk to tourists. ———— 8212;———&...
Invading Holland is still on hiatus for a short while. In the mean time please enjoy this post taken from May 2007 about one of the most confusing things that ever happened to me in this country. ...
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