** Chronicles of Vanity by Tara Cabullo

chroniclesofvanity.com · Feb 28, 2015

The Search for Happiness

I've had some friends mention to me Simon Pegg's movie Hector and the Search for Happiness, over the last few weeks. There was an initial desire to watch the film, an attempt, but it wasn't until I was wide awake at 2 AM that I kinda had no choice but watch because it was sitting right in my To Watch bucket.

It was okay.

That is not to undermine the film though: I think there was something in it that was calming: to know you're not the only one who is looking for happiness. I recall reading about Liz Gilbert's search for this, too, and so many TEDx videos about it. My favorite one would be Mathieu Ricard's and at almost 30, I do know it can be hard.

Some things I know of is that it's a choice. There will be days that I fall into the trap of nitpicking every single thing that's going not too right in my life and take it apart and analyze it. I find that when I do this, every minute from then on goes down into a downward spiral and I am trapped in a sea of not knowing what to do.

That's until I catch myself and realize that picking it all apart doesn't make them better. It seems, that life is one big act of letting go of things we cannot control. It's the capacity to enjoy the present, however much of a cliche that is. It's closing your eyes and opening them again to see things in a different light. It's moving away from yourself, your thoughts when your pulled down. It's taking a moment in moments that you feel don't work for you and gently remind yourself that what's good for you won't pass you by.

It's a lot of letting go and acceptance. And it's needing very little. Sometimes I feel like it's counter intuitive -- but I realize how happiness is never anchored on very few things in this lifetime. That is how I know one can be happiness {while also being sad, and other things, per Mr. Ricard}.

And I also know that happiness is an inside job, more than anything.

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