Crossroads

Hi Sweethearts! My girl Bella recently tweeted me: “Gurl, where ARE you?”. That is a good question. I am in the middle of one of the most challenging times in my life. I am in the moment, breathing, trying to leap one step forward, into the next moment. I am at a crossroads. I am working through the second heartbreak of my life. I have been in love twice in my life, and these past months I have been grappeling with the reality of letting go of the two men I have ever loved. The end of my marriage. The believing that I had met my next partner, the realizing that I had in fact not. I don`t love my job any more. I feel drained, shaken to the core. I am loosing weight by the minute. I am at a place that is devastating and life affirming, all at once. I am dealing with this phase of my life the only way I know how. I am holding on, defiantly. Affirming who I am to my self any way that I can. Grieving. Laughing. Making choices based on fear. Forgiving my self. Making new choices, based on the truth of who I am. Forcing my self to be hopeful. Giving thanks that I have not lost confidence in my self. Accepting that finding my self at this crossroads means that there is a new path ahead for me. Trying to not limit my view of my self, so that I don`t forget to be brave and take a leap. Recognizing that my heart will heal and love again. Knowing that my job is not my identity. Being honest with my self. Knowing that this is all a part of the human experience. I am reconnecting with my self. Deciding which road to take. Taking a deep breath. Getting ready to start walking. Darling friends. I apologize for being a stranger of late. I love you, and I am still here for you. I have such respect for you, and am so grateful to have you in my life. Tell me sweethearts, how do you deal with the crossroads in your lives? I would love to connect with you! For the full impact of your wonderful comments go to #byanikareaders where I quote and share your best ones! [email protected] @AnikaByAnika Facebook Crossroads originally appeared on By Anika Curvy fashionista. Self worth activist. Playful. Voulnerable. Strong. Budding designer. I am Anika on 16/10/2011.