TEEN IDLE

Is two days in a row too much for you, bbys? I just got really inspired yesterday by the fantastic weather we're having in Vegas and had to show you all how appropriate I dressed for it. The wind knocked my tripod over twice and my tie flew up and slapped me in the face while I was crossing a crosswalk. It was really cute, I felt like a winner. You know why? BECAUSE I LOOKED LIKE A WINNER! Or, at least, I felt like I looked like a winner. Point is, I won, Niemetz 1, wind 0, Vegas weather can kiss my ass.

But you know what can't kiss my ass? The new MARINA & THE DIAMONDS ALBUM!!! Electra Heart leaked yesterday and I supported my idol and waited for the official release to purchase it in iTunes found the first working torrent I could and bootlegged it in Starbucks because I'm a starving artist and I can't spend my money on luxuries like albums or lattes. Just kidding, I bought a latte, but my point is, fantastic album. Marina is one of my go-to examples when discussing top-notch artists with poor representation. Seriously, check out her album, trust me and my tastes. Teen Idle is probably one of the best songs on the album. My look is called Teen Idle. Keep scrolling.

Inner Visions by Ship'n'Shore blazer, Hathaway shirt, secondhand wool tie, secondhand sunglasses, Torino belt, RSQ jeans, Kenneth Cole ankle boots, secondhand messenger bag
Welcome back, natural lighting! Since my first look, I've shot all of my looks under artificial lighting because I felt like it went with the aesthetic, but those halogen bulbs are quality killers and I use a cheap camera, so I can't afford to compromise resolution. If anyone is considering giving up their career in photography for a career in, I don't know, veterinary studies or something, let me know. I'll help you get rid of all of your equipment. (Disclaimer: you have to teach me how to use it. This tripod took me a month.)

Let's also welcome back my business persona, who kind of took a back seat over the past month or two. I needed some time to be #dark, you know? Get in good with my inner goth, wear some spikes, call myself Constantine, you know, the whole bit. I missed Posh Spence, I really did. There comes a time in every young man's life when he gets stuck in a compromising Starbucks position. You know the one. You decide to treat yourself to a frappucino, you've eaten really well all day, so you opt to get the whipped cream on top. You deserve it. But apparently, Billy Barista doesn't seem to think so, because he serves you your drink sans whipped topping. Well, now your heart is set on those extra calories. How does Constantiniemetz handle this? "Oh....uh....I ordered....nvm bro". But Posh Spence? "Uh, hey, hi, yeah, I ordered this WITH the whipped cream on top? No, I'm pretty sure I did. I distinctly remember STARVING ALL DAY, I think I deserve it, don't you take that tone with me BILLY or you're going to have cake pops for eyes." Posh Spence will tell you what he wants, what he really, really wants.

If you didn't notice me not really talk about the blazer, it's because I love it, but I have a big confession to make. It's not exactly my size. It's not exactly long enough. It's not exactly for men. Just kidding, I don't really care about the last one, but I just hate when I find a blazer in EXACTLY the color I want and it's just slightly proportionately skewed. I hate it so much that I usually buy it anyways and regret it later. But DON'T YOU LOVE THE COLOR TOO??? Brick is one of my favorite colors because it makes my eyes look GREAT and I'm a narcissist. The same concept applies to my butt in this jeans. The ring is the newest addition to my budding collection of cheap costume jewelry. I also auto-love it because it fits at least one of my fingers perfectly.

Now, let's discuss my feet. These are actually ankle boots, they're Kenneth Cole, and they feel like socks. Like, really, straight up walking-on-sunshine. I've had an on-off relationship with faulty Kenneth Cole pieces in the past, but I think I can say that these boots brought me home to daddy (Daddy being Kenneth Cole). The buckle detailing isn't actually a part of the shoe's function, thanks to the zip-up sides, which means it's there STRICTLY TO MAKE YOUR OUTFIT CUTER!!! 1 KC

And bag. I never get a chance to use this bag because it doesn't fit my laptop, clashes with my all-black ensembles, and has a pocket-crazy interior that would be awesome if I needed to sort out 36 different tubes of chapstick, but otherwise don't play much role into bag organization. I thrifted this baby for a killer price, but I never could figure out it's origin. If you see this bag IRL, stop the carrier and inquire about their point of purchase.

Also, in internet music news, we all know I'm an obnoxious Lana Del Rey fan, I established yesterday how much I'm feeling Azealia Banks right now, so yesterday evening, my head EXPLODED.

I genuinely think that this was made for me. Dirty electro beat, rap verse, Lana. This song is me. I know what I'm jamming to in the shower for the next week.



Leave me a comment and let me know if you would rather go to prom with Constantiniemetz or Posh Spence.