31 Days {Day 17} – Change Your Five Words

Nora Ephron gave a wonderful commencement address to the Wellesley College graduating class of 1996. Her address was full of profound and interesting observations. But my favorite part of her speech is this:

And this is something else I want to tell you, one of the hundreds of things I didn’t know when I was sitting here so many years ago: you are not going to be you, fixed and immutable you, forever. We have a game we play when we’re waiting for tables in restaurants, where you have to write the five things that describe yourself on a piece of paper. When I was your age, I would have put: ambitious, Wellesley graduate, daughter, Democrat, single. Ten years later not one of those five things turned up on my list. I was: journalist, feminist, New Yorker, divorced, funny. Today not one of those five things turns up in my list: writer, director, mother, sister, happy. Whatever those five things are for you today, they won’t make the list in ten years — not that you still won’t be some of those things, but they won’t be the five most important things about you.

One of the best and scariest constants of life is change. We are changed by every person we meet, every experience we have…even the simple passage of time. But sometimes it takes us a while to realize that we’ve changed. We continue to see ourselves as the person we were 2, or 5 or even ten years ago, instead of recognizing that we have gradually, subtly, and yet undeniably, changed. We hold on to those 5 words that defined us best 5 years ago instead of embracing the 5 words that define us best now.

So consider this: What 5 words best describe you right now? How have they changed from last year? Five years ago? Ten years ago?

This post is part of the 31 Days Series-Choose Your Change. Did you miss a day? Visit the 31 Days Welcome page for links to each day.