Forgiveness

The dictionary definition of forgiveness is to stop feeling angry or resentful towards someone for an offence, flaw or mistake.

However that makes forgiveness appear to be an easy thing to do and I know from personal experience that forgiving someone or a group of people is very difficult. Forgiveness can feel like letting that person off the hook and helping them feel less guilty for hurting you, if they are feeling guilty at all. Forgiving someone is also directly connected to how we feel and the emotions we experience because if someone has offended or upset you, you are bound to feel upset, angry or frustrated. To forgive is to let go of all the negativity.
I always find the most forgiving people are peaceful, calm and more serene, they have an intelligent quality that makes them more knowledgeable and worldly. There is something in this though as forgiving someone can bring you peace because you begin to release the anger and pain.
Forgiveness brings a release as holding onto anger is like holding onto a hot stone that you intend to throw but the only person you are hurting is yourself. I know this to be true as I have held onto anger for a long time and I found it difficult to forgive members of my own family. The pain, hurt and anger remained for sometime and I know the healing process only began after I decided to forgive them.
Forgiving someone does not need to be a big show, you don't even need to tell the person or people you have forgiven them. One day in your heart and mind just do it and then you should start to feel better, start living and move on with your life. Time I find is certainly a healer in this case; after time has passed the feelings are less intense and raw.

While you may have forgiven someone you don't have to forget the way they treated you; forgiving and forgetting seem to go hand in hand however you can forgive and not necessarily forget because remembering how someone made you feel can take time to overcome. Furthermore you might decide that the person did not treat you very well and while you forgive them you would prefer to remember what they did so they cannot treat you like that in the further. An indication of someone's future behaviour is how they behaved in the past.

Forgiveness is a big thing to do no matter how large or small the pain you feel, however being able to move on and stop feeling angry or upset is paramount in our day to day lives; so the hardest but best thing might be to start the process of forgiving someone.

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