It kills me a little to watch you die slowly
I've always believed in the power of love, prayer, and good vibes~ call it whatever you want I have been feeling it surround me. Your comments are more than words they are compassionate hugs from familiar places. Thank you for caring so very much, I really can feel it and I really do appreciate it.
There was also the most beautiful rainbow that same day. Pretty kick ass present for a gay's man bday:)
The morning we arrived our Dad had fallen in the night. He can no longer be alone, use the bathroom or get out of bed. I thought I could just move on in and take care of him but I can't. It's too much for me all on my own. Here I am with a bag full of Depends, bed pads, bleach, butt wipes, air freshener and ginger ale. I felt exactly like I look in this picture.
But I'm better now. With the help of my amazing sister we found and hired a wonderful nurse to pretty much move in and take care of my Dad during the week. Hospice has been amazing too. I am surrounded by angels right now. My Dad decided he did not want to take that medicine to end his life. He is scared he'll throw it up. Last time he ate was April 5th. I'm just watching him starve to death. Hospice says he has maybe a week left.
Tracy and I found some old pictures in his house. Look at how handsome he was. It was so wonderful to lay in bed next to him and reminesece. He mentioned how loved he felt with both his girls by his side.
Here is a photo of my folks in 1967 before I was born. Don't you just love my Mom's dress and my dad looks like Elvis Costello.
and I'm ready for better days. Soon.
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