The Queen of Returns
The wonderful thing about the UK and general online shopping is the fab returns policy. I like the fact that we actually have changing rooms and you can do your own thing in them in privacy i.e. shake your hair like a shampoo model, pout like a member of the Jagger family, pose like a hot model and admire yourself in your chosen garment before you choose to buy. I like the fact that even if I've tried something on in the changing room and I buy it, I can still change my mind when I get home. Absolutely wonderbar!
I also like 365 day return policies (they do exist) and 28 day ones. I can live with 14 day ones and though not happy, I'll take the 7 days return which is still better than nothing. Because I am the Queen of Returns.
In January I bought and returned :
Manebi Fluorescent Pink Espadrilles.
Because that's what all sane people buy in January when it's hailing and there are thunderstorms lashing outside.
Manebi Fluorescent Pink Espadrilles
Basically I developed an obsession for pink shoes after seeing this pic on Pinterest.
Basically I developed an obsession for pink shoes after seeing this pic on Pinterest.
Via
So simple an outfit- so demented a pair of shoes. I loved the whole outfit and it set me off looking for Marc Jacobs pink mouse pumps because yes I truly am that susceptible. In the end I decided I didn't really want to wear mice on my feet but I wouldn't mind a pair of pink shoes. Which is how I ended up ordering a pair of fluorescent pink espadrilles from the Matches website when they had an extra 20% off their sale. They said they came up small so I thought the size 5 should be fine. They came, I opened the box, I moved aside the tissue paper, gasped and slammed down the box lid. They were the most truly terrifying shade of pink EVER. That pic above of the espadrilles are not a true representation of the colour - that's at about 50% luminosity. I eventually got them back out of the box and tried them on. Absolutely humongous! Boats! Cruise boats! Luminous cruise boats. They went back.
Dodo Le Parisienne Ballet Pumps
And then I put my sensible head back on and ordered some burgundy Dodo Le Parisenne ballet pumps because I thought they looked a pretty good dupe of the damson Porselli ballet pumps which I had been hankering after so long but couldn't bring myself to buy. They came, they fitted, they went back. The pump was a bit too structured, the leather a touch too shiny and the colour was a soupçon too red - basically they were not the damson Porsellis. And the daftest thing? I haven't even seen a pair of Porsellis in real life (!) to compare them to but I have this mental image of what they will be like and they will be the softest squidgiest leather ever in the most perfect yummy scrummy deep fabulous damson shade. I guess, this might be one of those pairs of shoes where it's the original or nothing. Ho hum. Better get saving.
So simple an outfit- so demented a pair of shoes. I loved the whole outfit and it set me off looking for Marc Jacobs pink mouse pumps because yes I truly am that susceptible. In the end I decided I didn't really want to wear mice on my feet but I wouldn't mind a pair of pink shoes. Which is how I ended up ordering a pair of fluorescent pink espadrilles from the Matches website when they had an extra 20% off their sale. They said they came up small so I thought the size 5 should be fine. They came, I opened the box, I moved aside the tissue paper, gasped and slammed down the box lid. They were the most truly terrifying shade of pink EVER. That pic above of the espadrilles are not a true representation of the colour - that's at about 50% luminosity. I eventually got them back out of the box and tried them on. Absolutely humongous! Boats! Cruise boats! Luminous cruise boats. They went back.
Dodo Le Parisienne Ballet Pumps
And then I put my sensible head back on and ordered some burgundy Dodo Le Parisenne ballet pumps because I thought they looked a pretty good dupe of the damson Porselli ballet pumps which I had been hankering after so long but couldn't bring myself to buy. They came, they fitted, they went back. The pump was a bit too structured, the leather a touch too shiny and the colour was a soupçon too red - basically they were not the damson Porsellis. And the daftest thing? I haven't even seen a pair of Porsellis in real life (!) to compare them to but I have this mental image of what they will be like and they will be the softest squidgiest leather ever in the most perfect yummy scrummy deep fabulous damson shade. I guess, this might be one of those pairs of shoes where it's the original or nothing. Ho hum. Better get saving.
Dodo Le Parisienne Burgundy Pumps
Manebi Pink Espadrilles.
Errr .... at the same time that I ordered the Dodo Le Parisienne ballet pumps, I ordered another pair of pink Manebi espadrilles because I never learn and I was still on a pink shoe bender. This time in a much softer shade. And in the right size. I had high hopes for these and I thought they were the most lovely stonewashed pink. I opened the box and unwrapped the tissue paper and I smiled. And then I took them out and my happy expression turned to one of puzzlement as I tried to figure out which shoe was the left and which was the right. Yup, it's a pair of those unifeet type shoes. Hmmph. It took me a while but I got there - the giveaway was the embroidered logo on the outer part of the shoe. I never even noticed this funny little trait with the previous pair as they were so big, my feet never touched the sides. Anyway, I did my round the rug strut in them and found myself flip flopping my way out of them. Huge again! So who's the clever eejit (I've been hanging around too many Irish ladies) who wrote that these came up small? They need to go back to school to learn their big from small. Anyway, the espadrilles went back.
Manebi Pink Espadrilles.
Errr .... at the same time that I ordered the Dodo Le Parisienne ballet pumps, I ordered another pair of pink Manebi espadrilles because I never learn and I was still on a pink shoe bender. This time in a much softer shade. And in the right size. I had high hopes for these and I thought they were the most lovely stonewashed pink. I opened the box and unwrapped the tissue paper and I smiled. And then I took them out and my happy expression turned to one of puzzlement as I tried to figure out which shoe was the left and which was the right. Yup, it's a pair of those unifeet type shoes. Hmmph. It took me a while but I got there - the giveaway was the embroidered logo on the outer part of the shoe. I never even noticed this funny little trait with the previous pair as they were so big, my feet never touched the sides. Anyway, I did my round the rug strut in them and found myself flip flopping my way out of them. Huge again! So who's the clever eejit (I've been hanging around too many Irish ladies) who wrote that these came up small? They need to go back to school to learn their big from small. Anyway, the espadrilles went back.
Manebi Pink Espadrilles
Dotty Perkins Denim Dress
Yes I extolled the virtues of this dress and I still stand by the fact that this is a fab little dress but there was the tiniest niggle - the length. And yes yes I know I said I didn't care anymore about how short my skirt lengths were but it turns out I do.
Dorothy Perkins Denim Dress
I think the dress cut off at an unflattering point on the legs for me. I'm classing this as a return as I didn't keep it but it did go to to a good home - to Michelle who has better legs. I errm bought another denim dress to placate my loss. But that's a story for another day. Moving on quickly .....
H&M Denim Dress
What's this? Not another denim dress? No sooner had I got rid of one and bought another, I spotted this one.
I think the dress cut off at an unflattering point on the legs for me. I'm classing this as a return as I didn't keep it but it did go to to a good home - to Michelle who has better legs. I errm bought another denim dress to placate my loss. But that's a story for another day. Moving on quickly .....
H&M Denim Dress
What's this? Not another denim dress? No sooner had I got rid of one and bought another, I spotted this one.
H&M denim dress
Beautiful summer colour and cut in a buffet style i.e. eat all you like style. And huge jam your hands in pockets. I loved it on sight. I took it home and threw it on and it was sooooo comfeeeee. And an inch too long. An inch doesn't sound like much but it really can be make or break on a dress for me. That one inch can land me in frumpy dumpy territory. There was also a little part of me which said "Come on now Sue, another denim dress ... really, seriously?" Yes really and seriously. Anyway, to cut a long story short, it's a lovely dress but I returned it. A girl can only have so many denim dresses you know!
Zara Sweatshirts
I ordered them in both colourways and kept neither. I liked the designs and disliked the material - a little bit too synthetic on the eye and to the touch. Such a shame as the cut was good and if it had been predominantly cotton, it could have been a whole different story.
Beautiful summer colour and cut in a buffet style i.e. eat all you like style. And huge jam your hands in pockets. I loved it on sight. I took it home and threw it on and it was sooooo comfeeeee. And an inch too long. An inch doesn't sound like much but it really can be make or break on a dress for me. That one inch can land me in frumpy dumpy territory. There was also a little part of me which said "Come on now Sue, another denim dress ... really, seriously?" Yes really and seriously. Anyway, to cut a long story short, it's a lovely dress but I returned it. A girl can only have so many denim dresses you know!
Zara Sweatshirts
I ordered them in both colourways and kept neither. I liked the designs and disliked the material - a little bit too synthetic on the eye and to the touch. Such a shame as the cut was good and if it had been predominantly cotton, it could have been a whole different story.
Zara Sweatshirts
I actually had high hopes for the minty green one - I am going through a serious trying every colour under the rainbow phase but alas it was not meant to be. Ah well. Besides, more sweatshirts have passed through my front door since then.
Zara White Ankle Strap Sandals
The thing with me is once I've get a bee in my bonnet about something, it buzzes till I finally splat it to death. I wanted white sandals last year and I found a lovely leather pair in Zara but there was a strap part at the back which gaped.
I actually had high hopes for the minty green one - I am going through a serious trying every colour under the rainbow phase but alas it was not meant to be. Ah well. Besides, more sweatshirts have passed through my front door since then.
Zara White Ankle Strap Sandals
The thing with me is once I've get a bee in my bonnet about something, it buzzes till I finally splat it to death. I wanted white sandals last year and I found a lovely leather pair in Zara but there was a strap part at the back which gaped.
Last years version with gappy bit at the back.
The gap bugged me enough to return them. I almost wish I hadn't as I haven't found a pair I like as much since. I still have this thing for the perfect white sandals and then these came along.
The gap bugged me enough to return them. I almost wish I hadn't as I haven't found a pair I like as much since. I still have this thing for the perfect white sandals and then these came along.
Zara Sandals
I loved the style, the heel was workable and the only hiccup I could see was that they were synthetic rather than real leather. And they appeared on the website for two days and then poooof! Gone. Oh! This is where I lose my mind again and then realise it's not me - it's them - they've sold out. But hey, I found them lurking in the corner of my local Zara! I brought them home, examined them thoroughly and declared the patent finish too plasticy. And they didn't fit me properly at the back again. So back they went. And do you know what? I already know I don't get on with Zara shoes and I never have (save for one pair of leather espadrilles) and I don't know why I still keep trying but I do. One day ... one day!
Moving on to February I bought and returned :
Zara Black Wax Coated Chinos.
I love chinos - a shape and style which works on me. I have 5 operational pairs (yes, sometimes I take a break from jeans but not often) so I think I can vouch for them. The Zara chinos I'd spotted online and then the Allwornout girls extolled their virtues and I thought this might be the answer to my wax coated prayers.
I loved the style, the heel was workable and the only hiccup I could see was that they were synthetic rather than real leather. And they appeared on the website for two days and then poooof! Gone. Oh! This is where I lose my mind again and then realise it's not me - it's them - they've sold out. But hey, I found them lurking in the corner of my local Zara! I brought them home, examined them thoroughly and declared the patent finish too plasticy. And they didn't fit me properly at the back again. So back they went. And do you know what? I already know I don't get on with Zara shoes and I never have (save for one pair of leather espadrilles) and I don't know why I still keep trying but I do. One day ... one day!
Moving on to February I bought and returned :
Zara Black Wax Coated Chinos.
I love chinos - a shape and style which works on me. I have 5 operational pairs (yes, sometimes I take a break from jeans but not often) so I think I can vouch for them. The Zara chinos I'd spotted online and then the Allwornout girls extolled their virtues and I thought this might be the answer to my wax coated prayers.
Zara Wax Coated Chinos
They came, they looked lovely from the front and were incredibly flattering and looked dire round the back. It wasnt the chinos fault, it was something more to do with my backside. Usually I don't look too closely but for some strange reason I was compelled to with these. There was a part of me that was thinking, what the eye doesn't see, we won't fuss about too much but I'm afraid the memory of my bum was lodged in there and it wasn't good. It really wasn't good. They went.
Zara Ivory Sweatshirt.
This came along at the same time as the lilac jumper and the black wax coated chinos.
They came, they looked lovely from the front and were incredibly flattering and looked dire round the back. It wasnt the chinos fault, it was something more to do with my backside. Usually I don't look too closely but for some strange reason I was compelled to with these. There was a part of me that was thinking, what the eye doesn't see, we won't fuss about too much but I'm afraid the memory of my bum was lodged in there and it wasn't good. It really wasn't good. They went.
Zara Ivory Sweatshirt.
This came along at the same time as the lilac jumper and the black wax coated chinos.
Zara Sweater With Trim
There is nothing wrong with this sweatshirt whatsoever. It's 100% cotton, has a touch of the Marant about it, looks great with blue jeans and yet I was strangely aloof to the said item. I don't know if I'm tiring a little of looking at the whole boho Marant thing but there's a part of me which thinks maybe its days are numbered. I still like what she puts out but I prefer the simpler lines and less flamboyant pieces. That's my thought for February - come March, I will be running round in rara skirts and will have probably bought this sweatshirt again. Oh yes, I bought this in a size small as opposed to the medium which I would normally have taken. Just incase anybody out there likes it.
Cos Graphic Print Jumper.
Hello? Are you still with me? Or were you just nodding off - this post is getting a bit long isn't it? I started it off thinking there wasn't that much but lo and behold this is an eye opener. Anyway, now that you're back in the room, did you know that Cos have some amazing sales? I got a bit trigger happy with the old buy button when they reached the end of their sales when some of their tops and blouses were going for somewhere between £15 to £18 each instead of their usual £45 - £60 bracket. I ordered 4 things (in for a penny, in for a pound) and the one I returned was this weird fitting little jumper. I liked the print, I knew what the cotton was going to be like - I just hadn't bargained on the fit. Short in the body and a bit off everywhere else. I bidded it bye bye!
There is nothing wrong with this sweatshirt whatsoever. It's 100% cotton, has a touch of the Marant about it, looks great with blue jeans and yet I was strangely aloof to the said item. I don't know if I'm tiring a little of looking at the whole boho Marant thing but there's a part of me which thinks maybe its days are numbered. I still like what she puts out but I prefer the simpler lines and less flamboyant pieces. That's my thought for February - come March, I will be running round in rara skirts and will have probably bought this sweatshirt again. Oh yes, I bought this in a size small as opposed to the medium which I would normally have taken. Just incase anybody out there likes it.
Cos Graphic Print Jumper.
Hello? Are you still with me? Or were you just nodding off - this post is getting a bit long isn't it? I started it off thinking there wasn't that much but lo and behold this is an eye opener. Anyway, now that you're back in the room, did you know that Cos have some amazing sales? I got a bit trigger happy with the old buy button when they reached the end of their sales when some of their tops and blouses were going for somewhere between £15 to £18 each instead of their usual £45 - £60 bracket. I ordered 4 things (in for a penny, in for a pound) and the one I returned was this weird fitting little jumper. I liked the print, I knew what the cotton was going to be like - I just hadn't bargained on the fit. Short in the body and a bit off everywhere else. I bidded it bye bye!
Cos Jumper
Zara Pleated Skirt
Yes it's a skirt. I'm branching out in to stuff I don't normally wear. And once I realised that, I had to send it back.
Zara Pleated Skirt
Yes it's a skirt. I'm branching out in to stuff I don't normally wear. And once I realised that, I had to send it back.
Zara Pleated Print Skirt
But it is a lovely colour and print. So sharp and vibrant for those who want to do colour but not a smack in the face colour as it can be toned down with a navy v-neck and dark accessories. I don't have a navy v-neck and for once I had my sensible head on because having this skirt would have meant additional purchases to make this wearable. Polish halo. But I still like it. Though it does little for my hips.
Chinti & Parker Dusky Pink Shirt
Guess what? I don't just shop and return at Zara you know and I do purchase from other places. This is a lovely cotton voile shirt. I had my fingers crossed for this and it might have been the reason why other purchases went back so I could have something nicer.
But it is a lovely colour and print. So sharp and vibrant for those who want to do colour but not a smack in the face colour as it can be toned down with a navy v-neck and dark accessories. I don't have a navy v-neck and for once I had my sensible head on because having this skirt would have meant additional purchases to make this wearable. Polish halo. But I still like it. Though it does little for my hips.
Chinti & Parker Dusky Pink Shirt
Guess what? I don't just shop and return at Zara you know and I do purchase from other places. This is a lovely cotton voile shirt. I had my fingers crossed for this and it might have been the reason why other purchases went back so I could have something nicer.
Chinti & Parker Voile Plain Shirt
The thing with me is I can't resist a nice soft cotton voile and especially when it's a lovely soft dusky shade like this. It has a timelessness about it and I love clothes like this which stay in your wardrobe year after year. Timeless and effortless. However, lovely as it was, it didn't fit. The armholes were cut very low which meant the sleeves pulled and were restrictive when you moved your arms. Gutted. Really gutted. I notice that this is now back at full price. Pfft!
Jigsaw Bayswater Pumps
Remember these? I put them on my Black Friday post last year and didn't buy them. They came up reduced at John Lewis just recently and I nabbed a pair.
The thing with me is I can't resist a nice soft cotton voile and especially when it's a lovely soft dusky shade like this. It has a timelessness about it and I love clothes like this which stay in your wardrobe year after year. Timeless and effortless. However, lovely as it was, it didn't fit. The armholes were cut very low which meant the sleeves pulled and were restrictive when you moved your arms. Gutted. Really gutted. I notice that this is now back at full price. Pfft!
Jigsaw Bayswater Pumps
Remember these? I put them on my Black Friday post last year and didn't buy them. They came up reduced at John Lewis just recently and I nabbed a pair.
Jigsaw Bayswater Pumps
They don't fit :o(
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So now that I've gone through that exercise, my conclusion is :
Or are there any challengers to my title out there? Who's as bad or worse than me? Fess up. You're in good company.
They don't fit :o(
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So now that I've gone through that exercise, my conclusion is :
- I've not had much luck shoe shopping these last two months. You don't say?
- I've bought and returned a lot to Zara. Somewhere along the way, they will finally get some money out of me.
- I like denim dresses. No kidding?
- I'm really susceptible and impressionable. Pink mouse pumps. Hmmm.
- When I say I like something, I mean it. Hence the fact I'm still chasing my tail over things I coveted last year.
- I guess I like to be really sure about what I want in my wardrobe. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
- I've well and truly earned my title as the Queen of Returns. Well and truly.
Or are there any challengers to my title out there? Who's as bad or worse than me? Fess up. You're in good company.
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