You either cover your ears and glare when Jerry in the cubicle over makes the decision on behalf of the entire office to switch the communal floor radio to 98.3, The Jingle Bell Station, OR: you are Jerry, your dream job is to deejay said station and you’ve been pre-gaming with Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas” since like, July of ’97.
You either relish like a kosher hot dog in the pure joy of being alone on a cold night with a cup of alcohol-infused tea and a backlog of “American Horror Story” to catch up on, put your phone on Airplane Mode and pretend to have a violent cold in so that you’re left the hell alone, or: you co-lament with friends about how you’re single during Cuffing Season, which is really a shame only because you’d rather go ice skating with the same person you’re sleeping with as opposed to Becky, who always shows off with her crappy double-axels and white skates.
So. Which one are you, and how soon is too soon?
Image on the left via Neiman Marcus’ holiday catalog, image on the right shot by Mark Pillai for 10 Magazine