Slow Down

Something I’m terrible at is slowing down. If I have plans, I get really anxious to start them immediately. If you follow me on instagram you’ve probably figured out I have a boyfriend. I haven’t had a boyfriend in a really long time. As a result I’ve gotten completely used to living my life in both the geographic and time constraints I want to live it. I haven’t had to compromise or discuss my day with anyone in so long that I kind of forgot it’s a part of being in a relationship.

This morning we had plans to go to a coffee shop together and “be productive.” Today, for me, that meant writing here in this space that I have accidentally neglected since March 13th. Last week it meant working on a big trial I had coming up (that thankfully is now over).

I planned to go to coffee around 10 AM (for the record, I’m not sure I shared this with him, I think I just thought it in my head and assumed that was how the day would go). Around that time we were just eating breakfast, which he graciously (and deliciously) cooked to share with me. At 11:45 I found the nicest way possible to ask, “Are we ever going to coffee or are we just doing nothing all day?” aka, “Hey, are you ready to leave yet?”

And maybe 15 minutes later, we left.

Guess what, guys? We got to coffee at noon. We sat down in an adorable coffee shop, pulled out our computers, and chatted while we got to work.

It was fine. I survived, he survived, the coffee shop was still standing, life did not implode.

In my rush to get to work I almost missed an incredibly peaceful morning. I almost missed letting him serve me in a sweet way for a meal I normally skip because “I don’t have time for it.” It only occurred to me once we sat down that there was absolutely no reason I had to stop living life just to get to work.

Coffee was even in a relaxing “drink here” mug, which I never order for myself even if I know I’m going to be staying.

I’m going to try to let this relaxed outlook on life be a good example for me. I was so slammed this month I didn’t feel like I could breathe for the first time until March 19th. That’s not OK. It’s not healthy. And it’s not honoring God, myself or anyone around me who I only gave one-half of my attention because I was so worried about a to-do list at work that is three pages long.

As we go through this Lenten Season and enter into spring, let’s slow down. I think it’s the right move, even if I have to be oddly intentional about it.

And PS. Maybe one day I’ll figure out this girlfriend thing again.

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