Rules of EtiKate: Dining Dos and Don’ts

Elegant state dinners come with the territory of being a member of the royal family, which is yet another aspect of being a duchess that Kate has taken to beautifully. At her most recent state dinner, at the Government House in Wellington while on tour in New Zealand, Kate stunned in a gorgeous Jenny Packham dress. These dinners are about more than just fancy dresses, though. Royal dinners require exceptional etiquette and table manners.

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While our own family dinners may not be quite as formal as the dinners Will and Kate get to attend, this does not mean we cannot have flawless etiquette. Whether you are just grabbing a quick dinner at Applebee’s or dining with the Queen herself, here are some dining etiquette tips that will elevate the class at your next dinner.

1. Always place your napkin in your lap upon arriving at the table.
2. Keep elbows off the table.
3. Chew quietly and with your mouth closed and do not talk while your mouth is full.
4. Do not talk excessively loud, especially when you are at a restaurant. The table next to you should not be able to hear your conversation.
5. Once you start eating, your silverware should not touch the table again. While there are different styles of etiquette that have different resting positions for silverware, the Continental style resting position looks like this:

To indicate that you are finished with your meal, place your silverware in this position:

6. If the waiter is coming around to pour more of a drink, but you do not want any more, simply hold your hand over your glass to signal to the waiter that you are set.
7. When leaving the table for any reason, simply say “Excuse me” and leave your napkin on your chair.
8. Serving dishes should be passed from left to right. If you would like more of an item during the meal, ask for it to be passed to you rather than reaching for it yourself. In addition, when you are passing an item, such as salt and pepper or the bread basket, it should always be placed on the table after the pass, instead of being passed hand-to-hand.
9. When tea and coffee are served, this indicates that the formal meal is over and you are now free to leave the table. It is still customary to excuse yourself before leaving the table.

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This list does not cover every dining custom and tradition but is meant to serve as a brief overview. I highly recommend Emily Post’s etiquette website to learn more about the specifics of any of these etiquette customs.

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