12 ways to support your blogger friend

Is your friend a blogger? Do you even know what the heck she’s doing on her blog//online diary? Because it’s really an online diary where she talks about her kids’ poopy diapers, right?

I had no idea what a blog was before I started blogging, and heck, even well into the blogging, four years ago. I truly thought it was like a few ladies talking about either their traumatic recoveries from birth, or their kids’ poop.

Now I’m sure my friends who don’t read my blog think the same of me: poop & birth stories. And, my friends who do, know this is the case.

If you are a blogger, and your friend is a blogger, and your blog is smaller than hers, how can you support her? If you are a blogger and your friend is a blogger, and your blog readership is bigger than hers, how can you support her?

I think the answer to all three scenarios: you’re a normal non-blogger, you’re a small-time blogger, or you’re a big-time blogger.

1) Subscribe to the blog.

Even if you don’t always read it, or heck, never read it. You’re helping her “numbers” and being supportive. That’s awesome of you. My first non-family subscriber four years ago was a good family friend, single dude, early thirties, who by no means wanted to read my blog. I’m pretty sure he’s never unsubscribed. And pretty sure he’s never read it. I almost cried for appreciation. (weird? yeah, I’m a blogger)

2) Follow her on social media.

Again, she can blog about culinary skillz you neither possess or are interested in mastering, but just following her on Facebook, twitter, or instagram can similarly help her get more readers, and touch lives that may really want and need to be connected with someone who has her particular perspective, be it mothering or designing bathrooms.

There’s a little thrill that runs through the heart of every blogger when their “likes” and “follower” numbers tick up. No, this isn’t hubris. It’s being affirmed. And feeling like you putting yourself out there to 7 billion people isn’t all for naught.

3) Enter her giveaways.

But Nell, I don’t want to win it. But gentle reader, again, this helps support her in the eyes of the company or person sponsoring the giveaway. If they see interest in the product, they’re more likely to work with her or her friends she refers to them, again. Also, it will make her feel cosy inside that you cared.

4) Comment periodically.

If you read blogs on your phone like most of us, it can be a real pain in the butt to comment. You have to go through these hoops and steps. But every comment matters. Even if it’s just “hey, I loved this.” I know big bloggers read their comments, and little bloggers read our comments. It means a lot a lot.

When I shared that I’d discovered inadvertently that someone thought I was a vapid shallow idiot (on the internet, to clarify for those who feel that way in real life), and I blogged about it to defend my shredded lil heart, you guys came out in droves to comment. My favorite history teach from high school commented. My favorite southern belle girlfriend commented. My siblings either commented or texted me. Or called me and told me the internet was dumb :)

5) Tell your friends//fellow bloggers.

You may not like the blog, or really read the blog, but share about it on Facebook or forward it via email occasionally if you feel so moved. Again, someone else might just really need to hear those affirming words that they’re not alone, drowning in dirty laundry, or a great fashion tip with their wardrobe from the 90’s. Don’t knock my leg warmers. Again, Facebook has weird algorithms and if you share from the blog’s page to your own, it may magically boost the viewers it actually shows that page to!

6) Put them on your blog roll.

You’d be surprised how many times I see people have clicked over to me from someone’s blogroll (list of blogs they read on their own blog), and happily how many more times people click from my blog to my friends. It’s a small way of sharing readers and traffic. And a really nice way for me to find new blogs!

7) Do not trash talk.

If you don’t like someone’s blog, or post, or perspective. especially if you are a fellow blogger: do not trash talk on social media.

Friends!! This one hurts my heart so much. I hate seeing the passive aggressive comments darted toward other bloggers. I hate seeing the criticisms and in-fighting. It is not nice. It is not okay. Do not say something on social media you wouldn’t say to their face. If you’re that combative and you would go at them personally in person, okay, I guess that’s just who you are and yikes! But we all tend to hide behind our social media shield. Please, it’s ugly and unnecessary.

8) If they have affiliated links, click through.

Again, so say your blogger friend is trying to or successfully making a little money off her blog. Perhaps she has an amazon box–go click on there to buy whatever you were going to on amazon that day. It helps her. Say she’s advertising deodorant. Click on the links in the body of her post. Even if you don’t wear it (me!) or don’t like that brand. Why?

Because it shows the company that she has readers who care, and she may get a penny or seven per click. You’re helping her out. And good for her for having an opportunity to make a little moolah or so on the side. She works as hard as we all do on writing and up keeping these blogs. It’s a little something we can do to say thanks for writing.

9) Never offer unsolicited advice.

You may feel tempted, as we all do, to share your unsolicited advice about the design, content, actions of a fellow blogger. Ironically, despite her writing to 7 billion people, she and all of us do not cotton to unsolicited advice. You may have the best of intentions, but let’s be real. In real life, you wouldn’t want someone telling you how to design, write, edit, parent, cook, clean, or run your life. Unless you asked for it or have a relationship (close) with that person.

So we should all keep our lips zipped. Which for me is hard because I LOVE offering my version of insights. Well, I’ve learned to keep it to my blog post and then people can read or see it there and either follow or laugh at! I wrote tips for a better blog after my visit to the Hundred Event.

10) You don’t have time for any of this.

You’re a working mom who hardly has time to bathe the kiddos before the long kiss of death bedtime ensues. I get it. Totally. Don’t worry about it. Just know these are the kinds of things that run through bloggers heads that they appreciate and love and when you have a few seconds, and you know your friend could use the boost, do one or two.

11) Is this all about ego?

I talk about this a lot with my blogger friends. The pull back and forth of whether or not we are just egomaniacs. Why do we blog? I think I know why I do, but everyone’s reasons are different. At the end of the day, it’s about connecting. And affirmation. Two things women usually really truly need and deeply desire. Maybe you can write us bloggers all off as just total narcissists, but I have met lots of them and I don’t think that’s the case. You decide, ultimately!

12) Enjoy it.

I’m in a season of life where I blog several times a week, am thrilled to be able to reach out to a company and say, will you give this to my readers for free or at a discount??, but this won’t always be the case. We’ll probably have more children and with homeschooling and then feeding all of them homemade food for the most part, and sewing things for them, I will probably not do this forever. I love it now. I love my friends from it. I love talking and connecting with you. Thank you for being here.