trying to be present.

pretty crazy to think I just got back from a trip I’d been dreaming about and planning for for months.

now it’s over.

I love to write. I love to travel. I love to be in Africa. I love to support missionaries their ministries. I love to be with people.

so this kind of trip was perfect for me. a culmination of so many of my gifts passions.

I sorta sound like a broken record.

I started writing this post right after my trip with Sole Hope back in March. but as I look back, I can foresee me saying the same things when I get back from my #StyleForJustice trip too. The culmination of a dream fulfilled. Getting to travel to a country (and continent) I love, with two organizations I love, and with friends and other amazing women I’ve looked up to for years. writing, taking photographs, learning more about the work of IJM and re-connecting with Noonday’s group of artisans I met 3 years ago.

what happens when these things are over?

re-entry after trips like these to Africa is hard.

but what happens when after this trip, there is nothing on the calendar?

nothing to look forward to. to pray for, plan for and pack for.

no group of women to connect with, pray for and travel with.

what happens when, like me, one of my biggest dreams will be fulfilled and OVER???

these are the thoughts that go through my head, yet I know without a shadow of a doubt that God has cleared my fall schedule for a reason. I have no idea what that reason could be, but I have peace about it. I do stay up late and think about what the reason could be – a move? a new job? a baby? africa? but regardless of the WHY I know the WHO. I know WHO is in control and although my human-ness wants to freak out, the peace of Christ that surpasses all understanding gives me all I need to be calm.

it’s almost here, ya know? My husband gives me the daily count down, and most of the time I put my hands over my ears. Not because I’m not ready for it to be here, but because I’m not ready for it to be over.

Today, I am going to make a couscous effort to not just think about the future, but to live in the present. to enjoy every moment, soak them all in one at a time, and be present.

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all but 1 photo by Wandering with Mary

trying to be present. is a post from: Gloriously Ruined