Decisions, decisions
Life has no plan.
I've come to an important realisation today. For most of my life, I've pushed myself to the absolute limit to live up to not only the expectations of people around me, but to the incredibly high expectations I put on myself. Everything was planned down to the smallest detail - at 17 I would start my bachelors degree. By 21, I'd be out gaining experience in the workforce. 25 be at the next level, find a partner. Buy a car, put a deposit on a house. The problem with this is that it was only what I THOUGHT I wanted. Pushing myself to reach those goals didn't make me happy. In fact, it did the opposite.
Goals don't work for everyone.
Constantly monitoring the achievements of others my age just exacerbated my need to plan for a stable future. To what end? I ended up starting a Masters degree at university merely as a back-up plan, before I had even attempted to set out and achieve my dream of being a successful travel writer. I was planning for failure, and tying up all loose ends before anything had even unravelled. My plan became so important, that the stress of not meeting my own deadlines made me physically ill. The stress just built up and up until it exploded in an epic climax. Ultimately - I was unhappy. Why was I forcing myself through another degree when I could be out there see the world and doing what makes me happy?
The future is now.
As human beings, we have this incessant need to want to plan for the future. For me, that meant over preparing myself for 'life in the future' at the total expense of my happiness and well-being. The thing is, we don't know what the future will bring - life is unpredictable! You just have to do the best you can do with the time you're given. It is all part of the experience.
Today, after many sleepless nights I made the decision to do away with my Masters back-up plan. Sending in the request for suspension was honestly one of the most liberating moments of my life. I'm read to go out, see the world, and have a good go at making my writing career become a reality. I plan on heading overseas in June, no clue where yet but that doesn't matter. I'm as prepared for the future as I'll ever be, and no amount of planning will help me see what's coming around the corner.
