Happiness

For the first time in my marriage I lied to my wife repeatedly and shamelessly for weeks, concocting elaborate stories and scenarios that set up a chain of events that would ultimately lead to her being just the right amount of disappointed in me, so that I could surprise her with one of those big surprise parties where all her friends would jump out and yell, "SURPRISE!!!!" and then Cole would cry happy tears and sob a little bit. And last week I pulled it off, a surprise party for Coles 30th birthday, and let me tell you, it was not easy. We share everything, our phones are always out and open, we share computers and my email is constantly spitting out alerts, we share passwords to everything, and if I am not traveling we are almost always around one another. So almost all of the planning was done in the car in the 10 minutes it takes me to drive to the gym, and the 10 minutes home, jabbering way too fast like a spazz Im sure. And things like this can never be accomplished without a crew of really great friends to help. People love surprises, but not nearly as much as they love surprising others, and that was definitely one of the best parts about planning this whole thing-- I got to see how much people truly care about her. Its amazing to know how much she is loved by others, and it was a sweet reminder to me that not only is she good to us, but to everyone that is in her life. Its easy for me to stay in our bubble, and this party pulled me out of it more than I am used to, and that ended up being a little surprise for me. And of course one of the first things Cole says to me after she turned 30... "So are you excited to finally sleep with a woman in her 30s?!" Some people that have seen the photos I posted above mentioned they rarely see me smile this way, some of those people have been my friends for years, Cole sees me smile this way 100 times a day.I love this woman so much and never knew that true happiness had little to do with smiles and laughter, but had everything to do with comfort, how calm my heart and head can be while wholly existing with her. Its incredibly lucky to be loved this way, and I get to be exactly who I am around her, shamelessly and unapologetically me, without a shred of fear or self consciousness I know that she loves me for it, and thats when the real toothy Mchuge smile comes out. Thats the kind of gooey magic I want for my kids to find when they are older and start talking about love. Ill be listening for that description and watching their smiles.