Flying Without Wings: Ceremony Part 2—Erusin

Once everyone was in position, and the music died down, the cantor started with a prayer, Bruchim Habayim* (literal translation: “blessed are those who come”), which is a prayer to welcome our guests, and to welcome Gander and I to our chuppah.

Once the prayer was completed, the rabbi began, in English, with his words of welcome.

Gander and Goose, what a pleasure it is to welcome you to your chuppah, to your traditional marriage canopy. This chuppah represents the home that you will build together. It is open on all sides, which represents that we, your family and friends, have assembled here to celebrate your home, and to affirm your marriage. You have approached, representing separate circles, and as your circles encircled one another, they integrated into one. As the earth has revolved around the sun seven times to complete creation, you have revolved around one another, symbolically reenacting creation, forming a new world, and bringing your love to new dimensions. This is a holy day. By exchanging rings, and exchanging vows, the two of you will enter into kidushin – the holy vow of marriage. We, as your family and friends, are here to witness your union, and to support your choice to dedicate your lives to one another. As you leave, your relationship will be transformed, elevated to a new level of love.

Our ceremony consists of a number of traditional blessings, and two cups of wine. The first cup represents erusin, the binding of your lives together. The second cup is nisuin, the cup of marriage, in which you pledge your love for each other. The kiddush cups that use today, they each have sentimental value. One cup is all the way back from Gander’s Bar Mitzvah, and the second is a precious gift that Miss Goose gave to Gander, when she returned from her Birthright experience in Israel. These cups are beautiful reminders of the life journeys that your family has taken that are now one. May you share all things from this day, on, in the same spirit of love and friendship with which you will share these cups of wine.

This chuppah, and this day is truly full of light, and we pray that the home you share together will also be full of light. Following a Chassidic tradition, we will now light two candles. This light reminds of the many individuals whose light shines upon you today, and especially in this sacred home. There are a number of people who couldn’t be with us physically, but we carry them with us on this afternoon, as we do every day. We’re especially thinking of Mother Goose’s Father, of Mother Goose’s Step Mother, of Father Goose’s Father, of Aba Gander’s Mother, of Aba Gander’s Father, of MIL Gander’s Brother, and of Aba Gander’s Brother. We’re holding these individuals in our hearts. I’d like to invite your moms to come forward now to light the candle.

We celebrate this joyous occasion with words that link us to our people’s rejoicing throughout the generations. We give thanks for this opportunity to affirm the recognition of family and household, as we join together in a shehecheyanu, our prayer for gratitude.

The cantor stepped in at that point to lead everyone (mainly Gander’s side) in reciting one of the most common prayers prayer, the Shehecheyanu* (the blessing of thanksgiving that celebrates reaching a celebratory moment or marking a significant first).

The rabbi then stepped forward again, and blessed the first cup of wine, which we proceeded to drink, and he continued with the service with two more Hebrew blessings before moving on to the ring ceremony.

The exchange of rings now takes place. At the moment the rings are present, a very special formula of vow is recited and witnessed before each of us, as the bride and groom thus become legally bound to one another.

Best Man M came up with both the rings, handed the first one of the rabbi, who handed it to Gander.

As Gander placed it on my finger, he recited “Haray, at m’kudeshet li b’taba’at zo k’dat Moshe v’Yisrael. By this ring, you are consecrated to me as my wife, in accordance with the laws of Moses and of Israel.”

Next, was my turn. Best Man M handed the second ring to the rabbi, who handed it to me, and I recited “Haray, ata m’kudesh li b’taba’at zo k’dat Moshe v’Yisrael. By this ring, you are consecrated to me as my husband, in accordance with the laws of Moses and of Israel.”

Once the rings were exchange, the erusin was completed, and all that was left was the nisuin.

All photos: PhotographyBZ unless otherwise stated
*Translations courtesy of Jewish English Lexicon

Missed something? Catch up here:

• A sneak preview with our highlight video
• A couple of blips in our wedding week
• We celebrate our Auf Ruf
• We deal with a few last minute details
• The ladies get ready
• What the guys did
• The ladies get dressed
• We have our first look
• We sign our ketubah
• We process to the chuppah

• pictures
• pro pics
• recap
• toronto

Mrs. Goose

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