The intention of cyber bullying

I wanted to take some time to answer the meme questions from Berry’s “Mean Comments” challenge, in hopes of someday looking back at this blog and feel like I actually put in something noteworthy. You know, other than talking about clothes, trunks and poseballs.

To get a well rounded view of what the meme is about, Berry has shared a video link talking about

The questions are on the heavy, and my answers are wordy. I don’t usually participate in the more ‘in depth’ memes/challenges. But because I am a mother of teenagers, I felt it was poignant.

1. Have you ever been subjected to mean comments online by strangers?

Yes and it never really fades away from your memory. Before I even came to Second Life, I was already heavily involved in the whole ‘chatroom’ drama days of old via Yahoo, MSN, AOL, my own personal blogs, etc etc…and mean comments were basically fodder for a wasted day of me, trying to ‘fix’ things.

2. How did you respond to them?

I tried to ‘fix’ things by replying, sending private messages, writing long emails…going nutso really. My personality type is that I’m constantly trying to please others and cannot rest easy if I know someone out there has any ill will towards me. Thankfully though, with age and a couple of years of retail work experience under my belt, I have matured into the elegant lady you see above. (Quite frankly, I don’t give a truck anymore…and that is healthy for me).

3. How did they make you feel?

Very small.

4. Can you share some of the mean comments you’ve received and your thoughts on them?

When I can find them, sure.

5. Have you ever ridiculed or negatively commented on someone else’s work, actions or personality with the intention to hurt them?

The word intention covers a multitude, doesn’t it? We say things ‘off the cuff’ and never think of how our words are received or perceived. I like to think I believe that there is some good in everyone, and that we ourselves are our own worst enemy. No one is perfect and sometimes what we think is a cute joke, or flippant, remark is no big deal.

Yet something changes in the atmosphere when we intend to aim negativity towards another person, whether they are aware of it or not. And that atmosphere either online, on forums, comment boxes, email…becomes toxic.

The taint of this kind of negativity seeps into minds and hearts so much so that it can damage not just the person who is receiving the ridicule/negativity, but even the person who has given it, those that are present around it and those who choose to feed into it.

Have I ever intentionally hurt someone like this?

Yes.

And if it were not for this powerful thing called forgiveness, I would not feel as whole of a person, as I do today. True, we can delete the replies, the emails, the comments with a click of a button. But the barbs still sting.

In the video, Ms. Lewinsky talks about a more compassionate internet, in where we can rather change the shift of the atmosphere with positivism, and of course compassion. In all of the three years I have been blogging about Second Life, I have thankfully been shielded from the most crude of audiences. Most of us have never had a ‘hater’ on our blogs. Many of us are quite the opposite actually, always encouraging, always cheerleading.. its really rather refreshing.

Wouldn’t it be awesome if our virtual community changed the paradigm? Where ‘cyber-bullying’ was non existent, and individuals could come finding compassion and acceptance.. even healing?

That’s the kind of community I’d like to belong to anyway, and thankfully I do.

You can find this week’s challenge at StrawberrySingh.com and do be sure to check out Berry’s Blog Challenges category for more great ideas for your own blog.

Until next time friends ♥

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Credits:
Hair: Analog Dog’s Motive | New
Skin: Lara Hurley’s Ivy Dark Tan
Hands: Slink Mesh Hands Horns
Nails: A:S:S: Dark Satine (for Slink Mesh Hands)
Rings: Luxe’ Dainty Rings
Tattoo: Reckless Pax
Ears: RealEvil’s ReVoX Mesh Ears E2
Eyelids: Slink Mesh Eyelids
Pose: Body Language SS Pose HUD | Creation.jp