Memoirs – Chapter One Hundred and Thirty Five

I am not a violent man. In fact I find violence as the lowest form of humanity and should be the last resort. Some see it as weak I guess but for me fighting is the last thing I want. What for? We are so much better if we make love and not war! Dalu had crossed a line. Fine he never got into the kind of trouble that he would need my back up on but I am certain I would never throw him under the bus the way he had done me. If I needed help making excuses I would have asked him for it not as opposed to him not knowing what’s good for me. I hated this. One woman had turned my life upside down. He knocked again and I told him to go away. He listened. Left alone to my thoughts I now had to worry about Lindiwe’s family. I was going to tell them straight up that I did not have money to pay damages because the truth is we never had sex. Ok that argument sounds like an excuse and won’t work. I was going to tell them that the baby was not mine how on earth did they come to that conclusion? That sounded better. Had she told them that I was her baby daddy? In the morning I went for breakfast where I found my boss and Dalu there. I could not possibly sit alone so I had to go and join them. It was so awkward. My boss immediately told me how Dalu had been stupid enough to assume he could take a walk in Jhb at night because someone tried to mug him. He had been punched in his efforts but nothing was stolen. He had not run to snitch on me then because if he had I am certain I would have been fired. With that said breakfast was just sombre. We all did not know what to say to each other I actually looked forward to going to the funeral. Eventually we got done and left.

When we got there my boss introduced us as from work. Someone went to call her brother because we had been expected as we had a part to play in the program. When they came to us, me especially because my boss had walked a short distance with Dalu to great some colleague that had flown on their own colleague from Cape Town. Even the union had sent a representative. The brothers were big. Forgive me I must correct myself, they were huge! How on earth were these two gorillas born out of a woman? I looked at the mother, a tiny woman to be honest and honestly God is great! They looked like Nigerian bouncers and what’s worse is that one introduced himself as Judas which just killed it. Did this tiny woman name her child Judas? It’s a good thing he was big then because with a name like that he would get beat up every day in a white school! I managed not to laugh as I steadied myself after this bad decision I had made agreeing to come here. I have expected the other brother to be called Iscariot when he introduced himself as Lance. Yeah I know, from Judas to Lance! Speechless!

“I am surprised you came. Most people in your situation would not have come!”

The one called Judas said. Now that simply was not going to help the situation. He was being nice to me.

“Can we discuss in private because you sent me a message I was not quite sure what you meant?”

I said as confident as possible even though I was dying inside. He seemed confused but he agreed and the brothers and I went outside with them. Now I really had no one to defend me if these man mountains were to man handle me.

“You said I must pay damages but I would like to understand for what?”

Again they did not expect that.

“I understand my sister was pregnant and you were the father?”

I put on my biggest shock face and told him that I was clueless what he was talking about.

“Are you calling us liars?”

He asked me. I told him no but what proof did they have that I was the father. They took a phone out and showed me messages. It was Lindiwe’s phone. I was so shocked it was the last thing I expected.
The last message she sent read,

“I can’t believe you allowed your wife to humiliate me like that. I never wanted to come but I thought you invited me to be close to your baby but it…”

The message had remained a draft because it was not sent. I know this because I never received it. Was it coming to me? Or had she died in the car accident because she was smsing someone about me? The pang that went through my chest at that point! She had died because of me. Why did I have to suffer like this? Now I will never forgive myself.

“What do you have to say now?”

He asked looking at me,

“I don’t know what to say? We were supposed to discuss it that day but that’s just it, we never slept together!”

I said to him. I did not know what else to say.

“We don’t want your money. We just want you to name the child so that the ancestors will accept him. We were not asking for money. You can give us r100 just as a symbolic gesture. No one expects you to marry a corpse!”

He said possibly annoyed at the way I had responded. I had misread their intent but that’s why I said black families all have different laws and traditions. I accepted what he said and he said he would arrange it. That went well. Now I could breathe. It was decided that for us our boss should speak as he represented the company. He did not seem too perturbed by the idea because lawyers love to speak!

The funeral, well it was a funeral. We buried her and they were a few minor gliches here and there but nothing spectacular. I meant the uncles as promised and what started of as r100 ended up as r1500. All in all I had paid for my sins. My phone had been off and when I switched it on I had an sms from Asthandile.

I was flying back that afternoon so I already had everything in the rented car. As soon as we left there I headed to the airport. When I got home all I wanted to do was rest. That’s all. I wanted to lie down and think of life. I was exhausted.

I opened the door to the house and I got the shock of my life. It was empty! My house was empty. The only thing left in the entire house was a tissue, tooth brush and soap.

Asthandile!

I picked up my phone and I remembered the sms she had sent which I had never opened. This time I did!

“I heard your woman is being buried to day. I came to pick up my things!”

*****The End*****

@diaryofazulugal
Mikeatdiary
Michael Nkululeko Maphoto
Happy Monday
CAN ALL THOSE WHO EMAILED ME LETTERS THAT HAVE NOT YET BEEN POSTED PLEASE RESEND THEM. I DON’T KNOW WHAT I DID IN MY MAIL BOX BUT I LOST A LOT OF MAIL AFTER I PRESSED SOMETHING. Sorry about that ladies and gentleman. MAY THE 25 YEAR OLD GIRL WHO WAS TAKING HER BROTHER TO SCHOOL, WENT TO UJ AND LOST HER FATHER (I THINK TUT) ALSO EMAIL BECAUSE THERE IS SOMEONE WHO WOULD LIKE TO HELP.

I APOLOGISE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE

Mike Maphoto

Dear Mike

My story is very long, so please just be patient when reading.

I was dating a guy from township X and we broke up 5 months later. While I was still in a relationship with this guy, there was another guy from township Y persuading me but backed off after I told him I was dating this guy. Township X and Y are 15km apart so people from these townships know each other and are also friends. This guy from township X is not friends with the guy from Y but they have mutual friends. After we broke up, I gave the guy from Y a chance. After a few weeks we went and slept at his friend’s (also from Y) flat at another town as we had things to do at that town. We found his friend’s flat mate there (also from Y). I didn’t know him and we were not introduced. After a week, I got a Facebook message from the flat mate. Apparently he saw me at X and asked around about me until he got my surname and searched for me on FB. I’m not from any of the 2 townships but visit X a lot it’s like my 2nd home. He didn’t know I was dating this guy from Y until he saw me at their flat. Ok. We started chatting with this guy after I gave him my number cause I was tired of chatting on FB. I told him I was dating his homeboy and he was like ok. The guy was very persistent and that’s when a thought came to my mind that probably when my bf goes to that town (he goes there very often) he brings his one night stands to their flat cos I once asked him why whenever he goes there he goes and drops his friend at his girlfriend’s place? They are friends, they can share a bed or one of them can sleep on a couch. This flat mate is a real gentleman compared to my bf. Him on the other hand behaves like we’ve been dating for 5 years. I tried to bring the spark in the relationship but failed dismally. I decided to give the flat mate a chance after a month of dating my bf cos he is everything I want in a man. Now the problem is, i can’t go to the flat cos I don’t want my bf’s friend to find out about us. What surprised me was when he told me the flat mate won’t say a thing. They are all from the same village but bf 1 and bf 2(the one from the flat) are not friends but are friends with the guy that stays with bf2. I decided to dumb them both as I was developing strong feelings for bf2 but the problem was, I was not free with him and was not ready for my bf1′s friend to see me with him and again, what other people including their friends were gonna say about me. Bf1 because I was really not happy with him even when the relationship was still new. Bf2 never gave up. He told me I mustn’t think about what people were gonna say as long as at the end of the day I’m happy. That he feels very strongly about us and I should stop calling myself a whore cos I’m not. He didn’t have a gf when we met and bf1 was having ups and downs with the baby mama. I don’t have kids and bf2 also. Bf1 gave up the very same day I dumbed him. He just told me it’s fine if that’s what I wanted. After a week, I got back with bf2 who even drove 250km to come and beg me to stay with him whereas the other one is just 70km from where I stay.
I’m still happy with bf2 but still can’t visit him at his flat because of his friend. I don’t want people to know about us yet, especially the flat mate. He’s certain he’s not gonna say or do anything and thinks we should just come out cos whether people find out about us now or later, they are still gonna talk and that he’ll be holding my hand every step of the way.
What do you guys think of me and what is it you think I should do about the flat mate thing as he can’t keep on paying for b&bs whereas he has a place. He’s been patient and hasn’t complained yet.

Ps: insults are also welcome

Nadia