Today’s post features photos from my Thrifted Maternity series. Click on the photo to see the whole post from the series. Have a great weekend!
What is Follow Friday? It’s a blog series I created a few years ago based on a Twitter meme. Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Would you like to be a guest photographer for Follow Friday? Email me!
allisonthemeep Whoever coined the term “homewrecker” obviously didn’t have children or pets.
theleanover *tapes rocket engines to skis* So long, suckers!
slackmistress When people say “she’s in a better place” I assume they mean an all-you-can-eat hotwings bar.
iboudreau Things I’ve considered adding as “skills” to my LinkedIn profile: – Explosions – Alien wrangling – butt – Directions to the gun show – updog
mode7games my fellow americans…pika-chu! pika-chu! pika-chu! pika-chu! pika-chu! pika-chu!…sorry, just let me finish this match…
SassyE I tweet for the people who take their lunch breaks in their car cuz you only have energy to socialize when you’re being paid for it
Jackclemens1 You ever try to step over a cat, then the cat panics and runs exactly where you’re stepping? That’s my mission statement.
slackmistress Ten more breakup days before Valentine’s Day!
asterios I’m a real “comedian’s comedian’s least favorite comedian”
TheThomason What turned Americans against science? Hard to say, but in my heart I’ll always know it was the “I fucking love science” facebook group.
notbedelia I was like, really good at being a baby.
HelloCullen obviously the new Harper Lee book is going to be called the “Chronicles of Gnarnia: Electric 2galoo: Katniss Strikes Back”
mitdasein 2 Kill 2 Mockingbird
mocoddle ·5now Mockingbird5
boominonion To Kill A Joke Format
joshgondelman Okay but isn’t every winter the winter of our discontent?
Teen: I can’t even.
Me: Oh you’d be surprised.
SpaghettiJesus I have to eat my fried chicken like I’m in prison bc my cat.
SpaghettiJesus The saddest part about dying is that you can’t make dead people feel bad for having been horrible monsters in life.
snazzmania still convinced katy perry & zooey deschanel are the same person like some kind of hannah montana situation
mgoldst Graphic Design Candy Hearts:
YWIR Let’s just keep stealing rocks from other planets until earth is the biggest one. That’s the plan, right?
lieberian The number one song on the day I was born was “Eye of the Tiger” which explains a lot, really.
robfee Next season on The Walking Dead, Rick finds a cure for the zombie virus but won’t give it to Carl because he believes vaccines aren’t natural.
shutupmikeginn Do people who brew their own beer know about money?
saraterror Okay. Rant over. I’d take my crabby pants off now, but they’re made of actual crabs, and their claws are buried deep in my flesh.
annetdonahue What if real sharks watched the Super Bowl and consider Katy Perry’s dancers an act of war
amydillon My husband’s superpower is snoring loud enough to wake me up, but not so loud that I could use it as my insanity defense in a murder trial.
Zaius13 Do they make a vape for cheese yet?
FMO_Nick #MillennialJeopardy
MagnetCarta #MillennialJeopardy
Caissie What is more embarrassing than breaking off a plastic fork in your food because you are eating so hard? Nothing. The answer is nothing.
mitdasein Time is an illusion. “Hammer time” is an allusion.
NicestHippo Joke’s on you, people trying to make me feel bad about Valentine’s Day — I feel bad every day
introvertedwife Women’s clothing sizes are decided by a giant wheel. This shirt shall be *spins* a medium!
lisaxy424 Everyday I’m bufferin’. – Hulu
drewtoothpaste They say you get more conservative as you age, which hopefully means most babies are Marxist
kerihw Hey girl are you a packet of cereal in transit because maybe you could settle for me.
CriminelleLaw a therapist is like the ultimate friend: you get to talk about yourself as much as you like and they’ll never ask you to help them move
DamonHunzeker Only six more weeks of life on Earth. Stupid groundhog.
sbellelauren saw the abs of katy perry’s back up dancer & let’s just say i would like to jump the shark
kerihw The name’s Bond. James Bond. B-O-N-D. Bond. Like pond. Bond. As in my word is my Bond. Bondybondybondy. Buh-ond. Bond. Boooond. Bond.
norcross This is one time where television really fails to capture the true excitement of a large squirrel predicting the weather.
ItsTheBrandi “I’m very angry about inaccurate snow forecasts by meteorologists but lemme ask this rodent what’s the weather forecast for spring.”
IjeomaOluo You know what? I’m just gonna say it. Pretty sure groundhogs aren’t real.
iboudreau These aren’t measles. They’re Freedom Spots.
SeiPhi They keep referencing a “clean pocket” and I don’t get what Gwyneth Paltrow has to do with this game. #SBXLIX
jenniferdaniel When do babies learn to cry on the *inside* like mommies and daddies?
drewtoothpaste My small satisfactions in daily life are quickly shut down by my internal shame for being proud of being slightly functional
meetar Nothing says weekend like a showeromelet
DrJenGunter if a “natural” lifestyle prevented measles no one would have ever had it before 1920
aimlessamers I hate it when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not even an actor.
johnmoe My pick for Super Bowl might be a little surprising and controversial but I say a pack of rabid raccoons wins, final score 116.8-grapes.
adamisacson I exercised my God-given right not to vaccinate our cat. Now, whenever my kid’s classmates start coughing up hairballs, I just play dumb.
norcross A haiku for today.
SomeChrisTweets NEW SPORTS: -Crimeball -Conversation Pit -Suddenly Triangles -Interrobanging? -Murder Escape -Eggnog… (Truly) -Thunderdome Palindromes
OhNoSheTwitnt Commercial: Why settle for less? Me: Laziness mostly.
audipenny Missed connection: You were asleep. I crashed through your window with like a trash bag of poems. Can you wake up and read these
senderblock23 When the moon hits your eye, you’re for sure going to die, that’s how that works
DanMentos 3yo: daddy, how many butts do spiders have? me: (without hesitation) eight, next question
theleanover Toast and ‘Odelay?’ Sounds like a real bread & Beck fest.
Toaster_Pastry My week on Twitter: I gained 6 followers, and lost my self-respect.
mocoddle The CDC needs to trace the epidemiology of sleeveless tees and vests with nothing on underneath.
ashley_barnhill You don’t have to be alone on a deserted island to draw a bloody handprint face on a volleyball and make a new friend
AddledPixie “Desperate times call for desperate measures” I say as I rub tuna juice on all 3 cats hoping it will make them groom each other & get along.
robfee Are you an Introvert? Extrovert? Outgoing Introvert? Incoming Outrovert? Inverted Trapt Concert? Reclusive Dessert? Invertebrate Polo Shirt?
luckyshirt HEY. HEY YOU. I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU. HEY. I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU AND EVERYONE YOU HAVE EVER LOVED. HEY. DID YOU HEAR ME? -small dogs
ImAmandaNelson Hair so big just shut it in a car door.
shariv67 The best thing about being a lifelong Boston driver is that I no longer fear death.
weinerdog4life It’s time to talk about the birds and the bees, and the birdbees, and beebirds, and the space ducks, and moon bats, and goose from top gun
ItsSuebob Hey Gwynnie, I get a steamy vagina for free every time I wear those jeans with 5% spandex.
markleggett Unemployment gives you time to follow your true passion: Worrying about money.
shhrugg How many light bulbs does it take to change a person
donni Realizing you’ll never have a realization that changes everything is a realization that changes everything
DavePolak I need a vending machine that dispenses pies.
UnicornFlavored I want Super Bowl snacks without the football. A super BOWL party that’s just bowls of snacks. Yes.
benicus_rex is Zooey Deschanel real or just a mason jar with bangs
radtoria Actually it’s pronounced po-kay-mon not po-kee-glurrrbbub (jocks are already dunking my head in the toilet)
introvertedwife Is anyone else concerned that the Budweiser commercial puppy isn’t aging?
morninggloria Can’t wait for the all-girl reboot of the US government
donni I’ve become the thing I dreaded most: An older version of me
torrami Is That Chocolate or Poop: A Mother’s Story
ShesAllWrite Today I tried to say, “I woke up with a headache,” but it came out, “I was born with a headache,” instead. That feels about right.
usedwigs I have a friend with the last name Hopps and I just wished her a “Hoppy Birthday” and no, I never get tired of crushing it on Facebook.
sbellelauren i eat everything with my hands so yeah i’m on the paleo diet
ThinkingSavage My resume is just a list of all the things I’ve done to try and give myself Spider-man’s powers.
protolalia Why is it romantic when a man proposes marriage with a lip-synching flash mob, but when I line up 50 cats to spell MARRY ME it’s just crazy?
MassageByTed I keep imagining the cast of Designing Women as the new Ghostbusters and it’s really perfect.
jenlaw_11 Women come into this country and take our ghostbusting and ghost related jobs
hendrixart My super bowl party fantasy is to dip dip into a bowl of dip.
Smethanie My dermatologist is the same age as me, and while he was getting his medical license, I was getting the tramp stamp he’s now removing! Life!
SomeChrisTweets Hey, Cheryl, can you have that thing on my desk by five? We are all scared of that thing, Cheryl. I do not care how you capture it, Cheryl.
joshgondelman If you pour ranch dressing on kale, both evaporate.
Robby_Phillips If you’re about to post a song lyric on social media, ask yourself is it worth it? Let me work it. I put my thing down flip it n reverse it
JTrainNeil There’s nothing we can do, Governor. His last meal request was Olive Garden’s never ending pasta bowl.
junkyard_jake A gaggle of geese. A murder of crows. A nope of laundry.
drewtoothpaste When grocery cashiers don’t recognize my produce, I say “It’s an orange.” That’s worked 100% of the time for 15 yrs in 3 different countries
WHEREISWALTJNR Make yourself indispensable at work by hiding everything.
-Mozart’s parents
thetigersez Don’t worry teens, it gets better. Then it gets worse. And better again. And then you die.
What is Follow Friday? It’s a blog series I created a few years ago based on a Twitter meme. Learn more about it in my FAQ. See my nomination for a Shorty Award for Follow Friday here. You can read more Follow Friday goodness here. Would you like to be a guest photographer for Follow Friday? Email me!
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