How I Changed My Lifestyle to Lose 30 Pounds (and become fit as fuck)

Two years ago (oddly enough, on my wedding day) I weighed almost 165 pounds at 5’8″. That was the heaviest I’d ever been in my entire life, and it was certainly the first time I’d ever been so nearly in the “overweight” category (if we’re going by BMI).

Today I’m creating this post because I recently hit my original goal weight of 135 pounds and I thought I’d share a bit about my journey. So much has changed!

---

Before I get started, I sadly need a bit of a disclaimer. Weightloss is such a touchy subject. Everyone has a different opinion on “what works” (even researchers). For every article you read about “why x helps you lose weight”, I guarantee there’s another out there that says “x doesn’t help you at all, it’s all about y.”

I want to be clear that the purpose of this post isn’t for me to give you advice. Even if I say things like, “I learned that x is how you lose fat” my intention isn’t to claim certain things as fact and others as false. That’s just how I talk. I may have learned something, and it may have worked for me, but my goal isn’t to convince you that x works and y doesn’t. The purpose of this post is to tell you what I learned, what I did, what worked for me, and what didn’t. Do with that information what you will (ignore it, use it, roll your eyes, whatever). But let’s not start a debate.

---

Photo of me in Egypt, around 148lbs

2014: It all started with “Keto”, three months after the wedding.

My husband and I decided to lose weight together. We did a bit of research and decided to try out the “Keto diet”. This is where you put your body into a state called “Ketosis”, which switches your body’s main fuel supply from carbs to fat. In order to get there, you need a low carb diet (typically less than ~25 grams of carbs per day).

Down to ~145 pounds

Keto lasted a few months and it went really well! In six weeks I lost 9.6 pounds and it felt effortless (in the same time period my husband lost 15!).

(If you’re wondering why first number on the graph is 157-ish and not 165, that’s because I did lose a little bit of weight before starting keto. Probably due to reducing my Oreo intake.)

The best part about keto was easily all the “goodie” foods we could eat.

• Butter! Loads of butter.
• Bacon. ♥
• Cheese.
• Cream.

I’ve already posted about some of my favourite keto meals if you want to check them out: The Keto Lifestyle Rocks!

After maybe 2-3 months of this I stopped keto. I started having some problems with dizziness, and while I couldn’t certainly say that keto was to blame, I decided to go off it as a test. The dizziness didn’t stop right away—it took a few months. So I still don’t really know what the cause was. But I never went back to keto just in case. (My husband stayed on it though and continued to love it!)

2015: Cardio, C25K, wannabe strength training, and no diet.

In June 2015 I posted about how I’d become a “fitness monkey”. And I kind of was.

• I’d completed Couch to 5K (you can read more about how I kicked its ass here).
• I’d started “baby strength training”. I call it that because I was mostly doing the NerdFitness beginner body weight workout over and over again, with like 2-3 dumbbell exercises sprinkled in occasionally.
• I’d started logging all my exercise days. It helped keep me going to see how much I was doing!

At this time my focus was on fitness—not weight loss. I was still down to about 145 pounds from keto, which was far more acceptable to me than 165. I was no longer in a hurry to lose weight. I wanted to lose more, but I was patient.

In hindsight, there are a few things I could tell you about this period. I don’t think I fully realized them until later.

• I didn’t love running. Sometimes I think I convinced myself I did, but I didn’t.
• What I liked, was the feeling of accomplishment. Take a 30 minute run. I didn’t enjoy it in the moment, but I enjoyed how I felt after. It was kind of like, “Holy shit, I can’t believe I just did that successfully.” I was proud of what I could do, but it wasn’t an enjoyable experience in itself.
• The commitment was what motivated me to keep going—not necessarily an enjoyment of the actual process.
• I liked the strength training most of all and I was ready to do more, but I was afraid. I was afraid of venturing into the weights section at the gym so I just did home workouts. I was afraid of looking stupid or doing things wrong. I was holding myself back because of those feelings.

2016: No more fear. I’m ready.

2016 has been amazing for me. It had nothing to do with new years resolutions. It had everything to me with me wanting to grab fitness by the balls and stop letting my insecurities rule my life.

January: First baby step into the weight area

My apartment gym has several weight machines, a cable machine, benches, and dumbbells. In January I finally told myself that I was going to stop being afraid of the weights and try out the machines. So I did.

And guess what? No one looked at me funny. No one judged me.

In fact, one gym regular who’d seen me on the treadmill all the time said, “Now that’s how you exercise!”

February: Big girl lifting, I’m ready for you

January was my time to break my insecurities about weightlifting. February was when I took the next step.

• I moved away from the machines and started using free weights.
• I started using a barbell.
• I started StrongLifts 5×5, which involved: barbell squats, barbell bench press, deadlifts, rows, and overhead press.

I was getting fitter and stronger.

But most importantly, I got my diet in check.

I started browsing two subreddits: /r/Fitness and /r/xxfitness. I learned a lot about both fitness, diet, and weightloss. With this new-found knowledge, I finally decided it was time to get my diet in check. I didn’t have that much weight to lose, but I wanted to drop another ~8 pounds to hit 135.

• I used an online calculator to figure out my “TDEE” (total daily energy expenditure). This is an estimate of how many calories you burn per day.
• My goal was to eat less than that number in order to lose weight.
• I logged everything in MyFitnessPal.

With my diet in check, the weight started coming off. There were ups and downs, which is common with weightlifting, but it was coming off. Over the next few months, I lost fat, built muscle, hit 135 pounds, but most importantly, I changed my body composition. If I’d just gotten down to 135 pounds without weightlifting, my body would look very different.

Weight loss graph from February 2016 to May 2016.

Below, you can see how my progress was nearly non-existent between June 2015 and January 2016, but huge between January and April!

Things I learned along the way

That’s my story, but now I’ll share some things I learned.

Baby steps are better than no steps.

I’m always weird about trying new things. I’m insecure about it. As I mentioned before, I’m afraid I’ll do it wrong, then people will look at me funny or judge me… It’s all very silly, but I can’t help it.

• First I was afraid of the gym completely. What if I got there and didn’t know how to turn on the treadmill? I’d look so stupid standing there trying to figure it out.
• Finally, I worked up the courage. I went to the gym in my apartment building (which is small and not often used) and I was fully prepared to look inside and go back home if it was occupied. It wasn’t, so I went in. I figured out the treadmill (it was easy). Thus started my cardio journey (and C25K).
• When I wanted to start strength training, I did bodyweight exercises at home where no one could see me.
• When I wanted to incorporate weights, I bought a set of dumbbells I could use at home.
• When I wanted to lift heavier, I worked up the courage to use the weight machines at the gym (again, when no one was there to see me possibly fail).
• When I decided I was comfy with the machines, I moved onto free weights (dumbbells).
• When I wanted to use the barbell, I took advantage of a free personal training session at another gym. I told the trainer, “I want to do StrongLifts 5×5—can you walk me through the exercises?” So he showed me squats, rows, bench press, deadlifts, and overhead press.

It took me two years to cycle through all those steps. But instead of taking no steps, I took baby steps, so I finally made progress. Slowly but surely.

Losing fat is about diet—not exercise.

Yes you burn calories while exercising, but exercise shouldn’t be used to lose fat. It should be used for two things:

1. To improve health.
2. To change body composition (i.e. build muscle).

No matter how much you exercise, you can still gain fat if your diet isn’t what it needs to be. If you’re still eating more calories than you’re burning, your fat is only going to keep building.

A popular phrase is, “you can’t outrun your fork” and it’s totally true. You can’t exercise to make up for a bad diet.

Finding a physical activity I loved made all the difference (keep looking!).

If you do want to get into exercise, it doesn’t have to suck. If you think it sucks, then you almost certainly won’t stick with it.

Remember when I said I didn’t love running? Well running isn’t the only option. I found my love in weightlifting.

• Half my time at the gym is spent resting. Exert a bunch of effort for a minute, then rest for like 3 minutes. I like that. It makes me look lazy, or like I spend all my gym time on my phone, but screw appearances. My results are undeniable.
• I like feeling strong and powerful. Some people love being able to run fast or run long distances—but I didn’t really care that much. But I LOVE feeling strong. Find what you love.
• Doing pull ups makes me feel like a total boss. This is my favourite exercise to hit new records with.
• Remember when I said I didn’t love running in the moment—I only liked the results afterwards? Well, I enjoy lifting in the moment.
• I love the affect lifting has on my body. Cardio did squat for changing my body composition. Weightlifting helped me build muscle, which means when I lost my fat, you could actually see something underneath it. This made me start to look “fit” instead of just “skinny” A lot of people think they look “skinny fat” and weightlifting helps change that.

Fitness can come in so many different forms. Running, lifting, cycling, rowing, swimming, rock climbing, soccer, basketball… Look hard enough and you can find that something that you enjoy. (Or if you truly don’t enjoy anything and your sole goal is weight loss, then seriously just focus on getting your diet in check. See previous point!)

The scale is just a number. What’s more important: the number on the scale or how you look in the mirror?

People set goal weights. They want to get to x pounds. But surely it isn’t the number you really care about, is it? We truly care about:

• Whether or not we’re at a healthy weight.
• How we look in the mirror (or in a bikini… or naked…).
• How our clothes fit.

Sure, this post started because I reached my “original goal weight of 135 lbs”, but somewhere along the way I realized that weight as a number is irrelevant. I want to LOOK good. I want to FEEL good. Those are the things I truly care about.

I keep calling it “my original goal weight” because it’s no longer my goal. I don’t have a “goal weight”. It stopped being my goal a long time ago. My new goal is just to look good, feel good, and get stronger.

I’m bringing this up because when you start weightlifting, the scale can lie to you. You can go up in weight but down in measurements. That’s because of muscle and water retention (more on that later). Muscle has weight and you build some when you weightlift. So you can gain weight but actually look skinnier and be a smaller clothing size.

I could eat so much more than I thought.

Thanks to the media and default MyFitnessPal settings, I thought that in order to lose fat, I had to eat insanely little.

• MyFitnessPal defaults to setting your goal to something outrageously low like 1200 calories.
• The media often highlights 1200-1400 calories as an acceptable allowance for women, or spotlights celebrities who supposedly eat in the 1200-1400 range.
• When I first saw the term “BMR” floating around, I thought that number represented how many calories you should eat to lose weight (mine was about 1450).

When I saw those things, I thought I had to eat that little in order to lose weight. That’s why I often ranted about how much I hated counting calories. Eating that little felt awful to me. Later I learned why…

…I could (and should!) eat so much more than that.

First, I learned that “BMR” (basal metabolic rate) is how many calories your body burns while basically in a coma. When you’re doing nothing. But when you factor in exercise, walking, digesting food, and even just sitting, your body actually burns quite a bit more than that. That’s where the “TDEE” (total daily energy expenditure) comes into play.

• BMR: Calories burned while doing absolutely nothing (in a coma). It’s the bare minimum your body needs to survive.
• TDEE: Calories burned during normal daily activity, after factoring in all kinds of movement you do throughout the day.

“Basal metabolic rate (BMR) is the amount of energy expended while at rest in a neutrally temperate environment, in the post-absorptive state (meaning that the digestive system is inactive, which requires about twelve hours of fasting).

The release of energy in this state is sufficient only for the functioning of the vital organs, such as the heart, lungs, brain and the rest of the nervous system, liver, kidneys, sex organs, muscles and skin.”

BodyBuilding.com

Between February and now I lost nearly 10 pounds and I was eating an average of 2,000 calories a day. Here’s a typical week for me:

Date Calories Meals
April 13 1796 Breakfast: Latte, blueberry muffin
Lunch: Chicken sandwich
Dinner: Meatballs with pasta, baked carrots, 100g bread
April 14 2319 Breakfast: Latte, 2 blueberry muffins
Lunch: Salami sandwich
Dinner: GBK bacon cheeseburger, GBK onion rings
April 15 1865 Breakfast: Latte, blueberry muffin
Lunch: Salami sandwich
Dinner: Paprika chicken and sweet potato
April 16 1936 Breakfast: Latte, blueberry muffin
Lunch: Paprika chicken sandwich
Dinner: Pizza
April 17 1757 Breakfast: Latte, blueberry muffin
Lunch: Ham and cheese baguette sandwich
Dinner: Chicken chow mein (take out)
April 18 2314 Breakfast: Latte, blueberry muffin
Lunch: Ham and cheese baguette sandwich
Dinner: Nando’s chicken fillet wrap, garlic bread, and creamy mash
April 19 1747 Breakfast: Latte, blueberry muffin
Lunch: Paprika chicken sandwich
Dinner: Paprika chicken, baked carrots, and sweet potato

NOT being restrictive in my diet helped me succeed.

• I drink Pepsi max.
• I have a latte and a muffin every morning for breakfast.
• I have pizza at least once a week.
• I order Nando’s (with two sides, TYVM) at least once a week.
• I have a cheeseburger and onion rings probably once every 10-14 days.
• I factor in dessert if I decide I want it (but often I’d rather just have a bigger dinner).

Those things don’t sound like dieting, do they?

If I want something, I make room for it.

I know I need to aim for an average of 2000 calories a day to lose weight. I usually end up having 50% 1700-1800 calorie days, which is when I eat “healthy” food. Then the other half of the week is made up of 2000-2400 calorie days, which is when I order take out and have the “unhealthy” stuff.

I keep my calories what I know I need them to be, then I let myself eat whatever I want within those limits. I ensure that I’m still meeting my goals, but let myself have some freedom.

• If you want dessert, you can work it into your day. Maybe it will be one cookie instead of five, but you can still make it happen.
• If you want pizza, then tweak your meals for that day to make room for pizza. Maybe it will be a small pizza instead of a large, but you can still have your pizza.

The “trick” is to create a new lifestyle for yourself—something you can live with for the rest of your life. I have no interest in cutting out all dessert or all pizza or all cheeseburgers. So, I eat those things in a way I can work with. I need to let myself indulge or I’ll get caught into a horrible diet/binge cycle that gets me nowhere.

But finding healthy foods that I really enjoyed also helped me.

Yes being lenient is important, but it was also equally important that I was able to find healthy (and low calorie) foods that I truly loved to eat. For me, that’s become one main meal: paprika chicken, sweet potato, and vegetables (usually carrots or asparagus).

I always hated vegetables. Or, maybe more accurately, I never LOVED them. Until now.

I learned how much seasoning helps.

• Plain asparagus: ehh.
• Asparagus with salt and a shitton of pepper: tasty!

Although these days I’m basically addicted to carrots. I season them with salt, tons of pepper (I eat it like candy), and garlic powder.

A typical “healthy”/”low calorie” day for me is:

• Breakfast: Latte with blueberry muffin (455 calories).
• Lunch: Baguette sandwich with paprika chicken, arugula, mozzarella, and mustard (546 calories — varies depending on the bread).
• Dinner: Paprika chicken, sweet potato, baked carrots (565 calories).

If you find foods that aren’t calorie dense, you can eat a lot. You’ll feel nice and full, but still be pretty low calories. Chicken and vegetables are great for that. That final meal is only 565 calories but it leaves me STUFFED.

There are some weeks where I have that exact meal 4 times. I love it that much. I suppose it helps that when I find a food I love, I can easily eat it every day.

It takes longer than you think to gain even one pound of fat.

• Weight fluctuates over the course of the day. It’s normal for your number on the scale to change 3-7ish pounds over one day. I probably weigh 135 pounds in the morning and more like 140 in the evening.
• When you exercise, your body will retain more water as your muscles recover. Water retention can cause the scale to go up. But it’s not fat—it’s water weight.

This is a super loose estimate (varies based on height/weight/etc.), but it takes approximately 3500 calories of overeating to truly gain one pound of fat. That’s not 3500 calories in a day, that’s an EXCESS of 3500 calories.

So let’s say my maintenance number (where I neither gain nor lose weight) is 2300 calories in a day. I have to eat 2300 3500 IN ONE DAY to gain one pound of fat in a day. That’s 5800 calories in one day. Insane.

My point is this: if you weigh yourself today and you’re 149, then you weigh yourself tomorrow and you’re 151, don’t freak out. It’s highly unlikely that you TRULY gained two pounds of fat.

Weightloss is not linear. Look at my weightloss graph. My weight didn’t go down every single day. I gain a bit, lose a bit, gain a bit, lose some more. Weight fluctuates all the time for so many different factors. Trends are the important thing. If you’re on a general downward trend over the course of multiple days, then you’re on the right track.

I realized that I have my whole life to get to where I want to be. I won’t put it off forever, but I also don’t need to rush.

This shouldn’t be used to put off weightloss and fitness forever, but it should be used to realize that slow progress is better than no progress.

When it finally clicked for me that I have all the time in the world to get to my goal, it was freeing. I didn’t have to get to 135 pounds by TOMORROW. Or even next month. It would take as long as it would take. And in the end, you could say it took me two years to lose 30 pounds, due to all the changes and on again off again. But I’m glad for every step of the journey. I learned so much and I don’t care that it took me two years.

This isn’t a “quick fix”. Any quick fixes are usually followed by quick rebounds back to where you started. This is a lifestyle change and those take time and patience. What I’ve done may have been slow, but it’s sustainable. It’s something I can imagine doing the rest of my life and that’s what’s important.

Your turn to share! Have you had a similar experience? Or is this something you will be going through in the future? Feel free to share in the comments. I’m listening!

How I Changed My Lifestyle to Lose 30 Pounds (and become fit as fuck) is copyrighted to Nose Graze.