Let’s Discuss: Getting personal on your blog

Photo by Alice Calypso. View more of her work here.

Last week, I had the pleasure of attending a one day mini-conference put on by Ladies Home Journal. The day brought together a group of local bloggers who had a chance to hear from two well-known, established bloggers (the fabulous Kendi from Kendi Everyday and the super-talented Joy from Joy the Baker). Admittedly, many of the nuggets of advice they offered were things you’ll hear at any blogging conference — stay authentic, focus on great content, find your own voice, work hard, be nice to people — but one question that was asked of both panelists was one I realized I’ve heard at every blogging conference, happy hour, dinner, lunch, brunch and consult I’ve ever been a part of:

HOW MUCH OF YOURSELF SHOULD YOU SHARE ON YOUR BLOG?

This is always such a tough boundary to navigate, largely because getting personal on your blog is, well, personal!And per usual, there is no right or wrong way to go about it. There are plenty of bloggers who will put it all out there and talk about tough topics like suicide, struggling with illness or health issues, finances, politics, and more. And then there are those that no matter how long you’ve read them and how much you love them, if you sit and think about it, you realize you know absolutely nothing about their lives.

My take? No matter who you are, the most important thing is to develop your blog’s voice. So if that’s done by telling stories about your personal life in a unique way, or sharing your opinion about hot button topics (and you’re 100% comfortable with it), go for it. Being honest and opinionated are two surefire ways to develop a loyal community and/or encourage discussion on your blog!

But, if you’re not game to put your personal life on the Internet, you shouldn’t feel obligated to do so — there are plenty of other ways to develop your blog’s voice (think: useful, original content; a unique photographic style; killer graphics; injecting humor into your writing — the list really goes on…and The Well should probably write a post about that some time too!).

All that being said, in my own experience, I have certainly found that posts which share insights into my personal life often get the highest levels of engagement — think extra comments, shares on social media, etc. But beyond the stats, for me, the best part about these posts is hearing from other women and either realizing I’m not alone in whatever I’m struggling with, or realizing that something I’ve written might have helped someone, even just a little bit. That is so gratifying — to me, it’s really what the whole “blogging community” is about! There have been several times where I was terrified to hit publish, but once I did and got positive feedback on my post, I felt glad to have put myself out there and connected with readers in a new, meaningful way.

Still, after so many years of blogging, there are definitely certain boundaries I don’t cross. For example, with the exception of a single post, my husband has never appeared on my blog or Instagram, and I have never shared his last name. I also don’t think I would ever feel comfortable talking about my family other than in passing, as I did very briefly when they recently came to visit. But, there are other topics that walk a fine line. I’m currently going back and forth about sharing a personal journey I’ve been on for over a year or so. And it’s hard, because on the one hand, I want to be transparent about what’s up with me, but on the other, I feel like some things should stay private. I’m still undecided on that one!

So today, I wanted to get a discussion going:

How personal do you get on your blog? How do you determine what’s appropriate for your blog, and what is off limits? Have you ever shared something that you regretted later, for any reason? And how do you navigate the boundary of talking about other people on your blog, when they may not like it, or even know about it?